John Barrymore

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin For one dollar and use it up in two…

— John Barrymore

In Genesis, it says that it is not good for a man to be alone; but sometimes it is a great relief.

— John Barrymore

My head is buried in the sands of tomorrow, while my tail feathers are singed by the hot sun of today.

— John Barrymore

I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o clock in the morning.

— John Barrymore

Mr. [John] Barrymore's smile was the smile of an actor who hates actors, and who knows that he is going to kill…

— John Barrymore

Why is there so much month left at the end of the money?

— John Barrymore

When archaeologists discover the missing arms of Venus de Milo, they will find she was wearing boxing gloves.

— John Barrymore

“happiness always sneaks in through a door you din't know you left open”

— john barrymore

He neither drank, smoked, nor rode a bicycle. Living frugally, saving his money, he died early, surrounded by greedy relatives. It was…

— John Barrymore

If it isn't the sheriff, it's the finance company; I've got more attachments on me than a vacuum cleaner.

— John Barrymore

Method acting? There are quite a few methods. Mine involves a lot of talent, a glass, and some cracked ice.

— John Barrymore

Paper napkins never return from a laundry - nor love from a trip to the law courts

— John Barrymore

My wife is the kind of girl who will not go anywhere without her mother, and her mother will go anywhere.

— John Barrymore

Sex: the thing that takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

— John Barrymore

The good die young, because they see it's no use living if you have got to be good.

— John Barrymore

I am thinking of taking a fifth wife. Why not? Solomon had a thousand wives and he is a synonym for wisdom.

— John Barrymore

You can't drown yourself in drink. I've tried, you float.

— John Barrymore

The way to fight a woman is with your hat - grab it and run

— John Barrymore

Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock.

— John Barrymore

Busy yourselves with this, you damned walruses, while the rest of use proceed with the libretto.

— John Barrymore

A man must pay the fiddler. In my case it so happened that a whole symphony orchestra often had to be subsidized.

— John Barrymore

You never realize how short a month is until you pay alimony.

— John Barrymore

You can only be as good as you dare to be bad.

— John Barrymore

I've read some of your modern free verse and wonder who set it free.

— John Barrymore

The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so little time.

— John Barrymore