If the man doesn't believe as we do, we say he is a crank, and that settles it. I mean, it does… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sometimes I lifted a chicken that warn't roosting comfortable, and took him along. Pap always said, take a chicken when you get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Heroine: Girl in a book who is saved from drowning by a hero and marries him next week, but if it was… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I wonder how much it would take to buy a soap bubble, if there were only one in the world. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
All war must be just the killing of strangers against whom you feel no personal animosity; strangers whom, in other circumstances, you… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Nevertheless we have this curious spectacle: daily the trained parrot in the pulpit gravely delivers himself of these ironies, which he has… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you send a damned fool to St. Louis, and you don't tell them he's a damned fool, they'll never find out. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is no other life; life itself is only a vision and a dream for nothing exists but space and you. If… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If the bubble reputation can be obtained only at the cannon's mouth, I am willing to go there for it, provided the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Where was the use, originally, in rushing this whole globe through in six days? It is likely that if more time had… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If the Christians of America could be persuaded to vote God and a clean ticket, it would bring about a moral revolution… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Constellations have always been troublesome things to name. If you give one of them a fanciful name, it will always refuse to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Such is professional jealousy; a scientist will never show any kindness for a theory which he did not start himself. There is… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A private should preserve a respectful attitude toward his superiors, and should seldom or never proceed so far as to offer suggestions… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The old saw says - 'Let a sleeping dog lie.' Experience knows better; experience says, If you want to convince do it… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If all the fools in this world should die, lordly God how lonely I should be. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Human beings seem to be a poor invention. If they are the noblest works of God where is the ignoblest? — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you would beseech a blessing upon yourself, beware! lest without intent you invoke a curse upon a neighbor at the same… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If I can capture truth in its simplest form, beauty will follow like a sledgehammer. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
We all belong to the nasty stinking little human race, & of course it is not nice for God's beloved vermin to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Begin with the determination to succeed and the work is half done already. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
