If you've never seen an elephant ski, then you've never been on acid. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Cause if you're a transvestite, you're actually a male tomboy, that's where the sexuality is. Yeah, it's not drag queen, no; gay… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If there were a god, don't you think he would have flicked Hitler's head off? — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
I am a professional transvestite, so I can run about in heels and not fall over. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you think about determination, if people have a heart and are determined, they can get to that place. But there are… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
How to survive boarding school. Do not express emotion, do not feel emotion, do not have emotion. If someone hits you, hit… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
I just play to progressive audiences. You know, if they're watching Discovery Channel, History Channel, that kind of thing, "Monty Python" have… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
In the UK a lot of people don't like to try. There's a different cultural thing. Here [in USA] if you try… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you can be your own force of nature and have a positive heart, then you can actually do something good in… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
For me to put a look together, if it's going to be a boy look or a girl look or whatever, is… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Sharks are just evil bastards. I'm quite happy if all the sharks just went, because they eat fish and us. And we… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
There's a thing about trying too hard, which I think is in all forms, which is if you really try to do… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
My sexuality is straight transvestite or male lesbian. It seems we are beyond the idea that I am gay and hiding it.… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you get too well-known, you can never be a comedian's comedian, it just won't sit well. But I'm fine with that.… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words, 'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well. Trouble is,… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
My dad said, "As long as you're happy." I used to think it was kind of a very simple idea or philosophy… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you're trying to get a bit of attention, you can smash up your hotel room or spend all your time going… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Learning that you have stamina is an excellent thing to know. If a project fails, I know I can pick myself up. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you're a performer, people tend to be quite positive about you or they have no opinion. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Well, if you don't have a flag, then you can't have a country. Those are the rules... that I just made up! — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
He [Charlie Chaplin] was always playing as if it were to the camera, if you've seen the live shots of him when… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Racist people, interestingly, are never as polite as smokers. Have you noticed that? Smokers always go, "Do you mind if I smoke?… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If I were Achilles I would put my foot in a f**k off block of concrete! — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
I love the fact that trying is respected. The American Dream: if you try, if you build it, they will come. I… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
The bottom line of comedy is to be funny, and the bottom line of drama is to be truthful. You can be… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
When I first came out, I thought, I want to walk like a real woman, I don't want to do mincing steps. And there… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
“You know, I don't believe that religions are religions. No, I believe they are philosophies with some good ideas and some fuckin' weird ones.” — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
If you've never seen an elephant ski, then you've never been on acid. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
I don't believe in God. I believe gods and devils are within us. It's our own battle. Our life's battle is to appeal to… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
“If you are an LGBT+ person and you come out, you have to go through your knight’s quest to create ground for yourself, to… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
I try to just talk about human stories and what I think about religion or teapots or whatever. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
This is your captain speaking. Welcome aboard flight...one, from...here to there. We'll be cruising at a height of ten feet, going up to twelve… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
You have the American dream! The dream is to be born in a gutter and grow up, and then get all the money in… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Because we all know one of the main factors of war is the element of surprise. And what could be more surprising than the… — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
We have two hundred languages in Europe. Two hundred languages! Count them! I know you won't! — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
![“He [Charlie Chaplin] was always playing as if it were…” quote by Eddie Izzard](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/429/eddie-izzard-1732_ability_he-charlie-chaplin-was-always-playing-as_2566917.jpg)
