I got this big fear of doing smoking jokes in my act and showing up five years from now goin' [puts mic to his neck and speaks as if he had a mechanical larynx] 'good evening everybody, remember me, smoking's… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I'm very tired of staring out into your vacant faces looking back at me. Wanting to fill your empty lives with humor you couldn't possibly think of yourself... Good evening! — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes] — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
If you don't think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD's and burn them. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
How many people disapprove of the job the Conservatives are doing? Seventy percent. Of those same people, how many will vote for them again?… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
BTW A 24 week old embryo is not a human being. You're not a human being until you're in my phone book. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Christianity has a built-in defense system: anything that questions a belief, no matter how logical the argument is, is the work of Satan by… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I'm just trying to rid the world of all these fevered egos that are tainting our collective unconscious... — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
I was told when I grew up I could be anything I wanted: a fireman, a policeman, a doctor – even President, it seemed.… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
Good comedy helps people know they're not alone. Great comedy provides an answer. — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
People ask me what I think about that woman priest thing. What, a woman priest? Women priests. Great, great. Now there's priests of both… — Bill Hicks Copy Share Image
![“I got this big fear of doing smoking jokes in my act and showing up five years from now goin' [puts mic to his neck and speaks as if he had a mechanical larynx] 'good evening everybody, remember me, smoking's bad. [puts cigarette to neck and mimics smoking it] Eeww. You ever seen somebody do that?…” quote by Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/8be/bill-hicks-970_bigs_i-got-this-big-fear-of-doing-smoking-jok_612628.jpg)
![“I'll smoke, I'll cough, I'll get the tumors, I'll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes]” quote by Bill Hicks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/3d2/bill-hicks-970_america_i-ll-smoke-i-ll-cough-i-ll-get-the-tumor_655.jpg)
