“The girl I used to love is no longer a girl, and this saddens me more than our separation. It puts my… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Love walked in the door like a dusty cowboy, and I looked that cowboy dead in his eyes and said, “I thought… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“It’s a new subject to me, and I’m just starting to get confused. The middle is the muddle, and the end is… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to help acclimate your body for your after death experience. Hell is hot, so you’d better warm… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“My life is a puff of smoke in a tornado. We are all furiously whirling into nothingness.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Death is like bedtime—we all want to put it off until tomorrow. But when you’re going to bed, I’m just getting up,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There was an eerie quiet about last night, like death sleeping on the beach of Lake Erie. I woke up with sand… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The spirit is tied to the brain—for the brain makes us who we are. So if our spirit lives after death, so… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Make yourself interesting to history. Master some aspect of life, and then find a different area and do something crazy. Become a… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A funeral home is like a grocery store of death. Are there any discounts in the meat department?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“What is life without death? That's like asking what is peanut butter without jelly? Or a baseball game on TV and changing… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Unless I’m dead, I’ll definitely be at your funeral. Just be sure to return the favor and show up at mine. Your… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Reginald “If” Ifa IV died today. His last words were, “Death, the great What if.” I dreamt this, but that doesn’t make… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I want to write a universal truism that won’t be blurred by body language, cultural confusion, or translation mishaps, so I want… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I killed a man for his shoes, and then I realized his feet were much smaller than mine. So I walked around… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“You may be dying, but I’m going to have a picnic and enjoy this glorious day. I won’t let your impending death… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Death is coming—but hopefully not before old age, decrepitude, and senility. ” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The peace corps looks like peace corpse, and death isn’t a very peaceful thought to me.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dream headline from Orafouraville Times: Man Let Go By Employer, Falls To Death” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I never speed, because if I get into an automobile crash and die, I don’t want to have arrived earlier than I… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Some people try to change the world one life at a time. Others try to change the world one death at a… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I notice when you’re gone. Or do I? How can I observe something that isn’t there?” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A blanket could be used to make sweet, sweet music with the love of your life. Hopefully that person is me, because I’ve been… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“A brick could be used to slow down time. Sort of like a camel in a wheelchair pushed by a thirsty Arab. Hey, Khalid,… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“We have a love so pure that it makes snow seem yellow. (Don’t eat it!)” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“I hid Mrs. Frozenwater’s body in the ice cube trays in my freezer. Better to keep her there than let her memory thaw out… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Two similar words might lead to two similar ideas. They might also lead to the basement, which I recently converted into a dungeon/torture chamber.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Nothing is and isn’t; nothing is and isn’t—nothing itself is, and at the same time, nothing isn’t.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“There’s only one piece of clothing I could eat fast, and that’s a scarf.” — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“Dora J. Arod is to Jarod Ora, as yes is to yes. Yes is also the correct answer to “Will you marry me?” Other… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
“The best part about being kidnapped is being blindfolded and getting kicked into the trunk of a car. Boy, normally I have to beg… — Jarod Kintz Copy Share Image
