In my mind, I was always a comedian who was going to branch into writing. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
“If someone like this were to like me, to like my comedy, and to like the way I conduct myself professionally, it… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
Stand-up is something I just truly love to do, so I'll always go back to it. I'll never stop doing it, that's… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
If you play comedic scenes like they're really serious, then it's so much more funny than if you're going for a laugh. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I've gotten very cynical and kind of anhedonic about all the things I have to do to get to do comedy: all… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I identify myself as a stand-up first. Even though lately there's been an explosion of acting on my schedule. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
Any comedian who tells you how dark and dangerous they are, they're not dark and dangerous. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I'm so beyond genre, drama, comedies, I just want to do really good, interesting projects. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
All the truly great stand-ups say, 'I go onstage, and I work on jokes. The inspiration will happen while I'm doing my… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I want to experience as many different tastes, sights, emotions, conflicts, and cultures as possible, so that I can expand the canvas… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
There's nothing wrong with doing comedies, and I'm not against comedies, either, but I always want to do stuff that keeps me… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
But for the most part, for the majority of a stand-up audience, you better have new stuff they've not heard. And if… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
Here's what I'm afraid of. I know a lot of comedians, friends of mine, who just got into the 'Doesn't matter what… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
You saw a lot of guys, especially in the early '90s, whose acts were a pitch for a sitcom. A lot of… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
Before doing my first open mic, I was sitting in the back watching all these comedians banter back and forth and fire… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so long, for so long, that they were… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I like confounding expectations. I can expand what it is I am able to do, and hopefully get to do more weird,… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I'm grateful that I had that uphill battle for 10 years of going onstage and having nobody know who I was, because… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
With a comedian, it's the opposite. You put that album out, and they've heard it. If they're coming out to see you,… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I think most comedians go through that (period), where you have to change or evolve. You don't want to just keep doing… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
“I'm sitting at the bar, rearranging the order of my jokes. I'm under the delusion that I'm having bad shows because of… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I'm glad that that era of stand-up is over, because I think it adversely affected a lot of people who could have… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I have a lot of friends who were stand-ups, and they just stopped after a while, because they didn't like that battle,… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
As you get older, as a comedian, and keep doing it, what you actually start to cherish on stage is not the… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
The process is to me is going onstage night after night after night after night until I get a new hour. And then once… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I can't say that I ever abided nerd stereotypes: I was never alone or felt outcast. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
“If I hear the term ‘healing journey’ one more f–king time… It is not a ‘healing journey.’ It’s a ‘numb slog.’ It’s just a,… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I think I realized it was an art form at the beginning, but it took me a really long time before I was able… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
I wish I had a really cool, esoteric answer, but what the process is to me is going onstage night after night after night… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
If I were to just focus on stand-up, I could actually, paradoxically enough, be home way more, because I would leave on a Friday,… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
“hobos' (a slang term that combines the words 'hope' and 'bowl of beans given to me for free by a woman who then initiated… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
As much as I know people love the method and what you can draw out of yourself, a lot of acting is very imaginative. — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
We're rewarding either the reality or the appearance of youth, which is why you have all these people in their fifties trying to act… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
With a comedian, it's the opposite. You put that album out, and they've heard it. If they're coming out to see you, you'd better… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
If you actually do cold readings, it's very close to how people actually talk, because you're experiencing these thoughts anew every moment, and trying… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
What I was trying to say in that bit, without saying it out loud, is that there were things - you're right, everything is… — Patton Oswalt Copy Share Image
