Looking back, I remember my family laughing a lot. We were never the kind of people that dwelled on hard times. My… — Cristela Alonzo Copy Share Image
Small Man can be a very funny or a very tiresome Tour Companion, depending on how this kind of thing grabs you.… — Diana Wynne Jones Copy Share Image
[There's] a joke that I've done forever: 'Nowadays they say that the largest majority of people will be Latino and you'll tell… — George Lopez Copy Share Image
He [Reagan] likes to tell jokes and that's why he told the ethnic joke that got him into some trouble. Perhaps if… — Robert Scheer Copy Share Image
The movie studios, they only like to make - I make a joke, but it's true - if the movie has the… — Rob Reiner Copy Share Image
He was the class clown, the court jester, because he'd learn early that if you cracked jokes and pretended you weren't scared,… — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
Have you heard about the morning after pill, or what I like to call breakfast in bed. Well have you heard about… — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
“I was thinking we could get a picture of you holding a pitchfork or something. Maybe a big wooden cross? Sound good?"(Brian)… — Stacia Kane Copy Share Image
Who could quarrel with Clark Gable? We got on well. Whenever anyone on the set was tired or depressed, it was Gable… — Vivien Leigh Copy Share Image
Be prepared to cut your little extra lines that come after a big punchline and move on to the next joke or… — Franklyn Ajaye Copy Share Image
In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup,… — John Oliver Copy Share Image
I used to forget that I was an Indian woman. I would even forget that I was a woman. I don't think… — Mindy Kaling Copy Share Image
There's a joke about the balloon boy who has a balloon mum and a balloon dad and he goes to a balloon… — Gabrielle Williams Copy Share Image
I've definitely become smuttier. When I first started out, I had these aspirations: 'I'm not going to do jokes about anything crude… — Jack Whitehall Copy Share Image
What people who don't write don't understand is that they think you make up the line consciously — but you don't. It… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“I’m relieved to see that even brilliant physicists make mistakes.” Kohler looked over. “What do you mean?” “Whoever wrote that note made… — Dan Brown Copy Share Image
The thing you start noticing as books go by, is that you become aware not only of a shape of a career,… — Nathan Englander Copy Share Image
I think in my case, I had no choice but to have a good sense of humor. I grew up with my… — Marlo Thomas Copy Share Image
I remember what J. Golden Kimball said when he came down to the stake where I was presiding. I introduced him as… — Hugh B. Brown Copy Share Image
A lot of comics aren't their on-screen personas; Chris Rock isn't always ranting and raving. What I do is make myself this… — Billy Eichner Copy Share Image
And yes, my plan will continue to reduce the carbon pollution that is heating our planet - because climate change is not… — Barack Obama Copy Share Image
I'm definitely not gonna make a joke about separating the whites and colours, so don't try to make me. So instead, I'll… — Toby Turner Copy Share Image
One of my favorite things on the show was just getting to do my own monologue and talking about someone who killed… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
I often joke with my audiences that I make most of my income on a ski pole. People smile but they get… — Robin Sharma Copy Share Image
I really like intimate venues because it feels like everyone in the audience is in on all our inside jokes. We could… — BØRNS Copy Share Image
Am I lonely? Yes. Am I upset? Yes. Am I confused? Yes. Do I have my days when I've thrown a little… — Jennifer Aniston Copy Share Image
I don't have to change anything. I think that's the secret to comedy. You want to be universal and appeal to everyone.… — Kevin Hart Copy Share Image
There's a wonderful old Italian joke about a poor man who goes to church every day and prays before the statue of… — Elizabeth Gilbert Copy Share Image
Sometimes I feel that I am destined always to be offstage whenever the main action occurs. That God has made me the… — Jonathan Coe Copy Share Image
Most of us have participated in the trust exercise in which one person falls back and is caught by a peer. Even… — Rafe Esquith Copy Share Image
I knew I just loved comedy, and I think it was my parents who initially brought up the notion of me trying… — Seth Rogen Copy Share Image
I was interested in all kinds of things, whether it be Avatar, Mad Men, Troy, 300, Battlestar Gallactica, or the poems of… — Daniel Mendelsohn Copy Share Image
I remember a long, long day of filming and it took forever to get Kirk Douglas up on his cross. We played… — Jean Simmons Copy Share Image
Self-indulgence takes many forms. A man may be self-indulgent in speech, in touch, in sight. From self-indulgence a man comes to idle… — Dorotheus of Gaza Copy Share Image
Even if you get a joke right you've done it a thousand times and sometimes there's times where it just doesn't work… — Godfrey Copy Share Image
Jokes apart, people are constantly asking me, 'What are you doing for the industry?' When one makes a blockbuster, you plough back… — Rohit Shetty Copy Share Image
I detest jokes - when somebody tells me one, I feel my IQ dropping; the brain cells start to disappear. But something… — Johnny Depp Copy Share Image
You are just jealous," Magnus remarked calmly. "Because you do not have the soul of a true artiste like myself." "Oh, I… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
What a vast fraternity it is,--that of 'Hearts that Ache.' For the last three months it has seemed to me as though… — Henry Adams Copy Share Image
I feel like I'm a compassionate guy, but I also feel if somebody's grip on life or sanity is so tenuous that… — Dan Savage Copy Share Image
![“[There's] a joke that I've done forever: 'Nowadays they say that the largest majority of people will be Latino and you'll tell scary stories to your grandkids: "A long time ago when I was growing up, there used to be people who were white," and the kid says, "Really?" and you say, "Yeah, like the…” quote by George Lopez](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/f96/george-lopez-3932_cutting_there-s-a-joke-that-i-ve-done-forever-no_1664664.jpg)
![“He [Reagan] likes to tell jokes and that's why he told the ethnic joke that got him into some trouble. Perhaps if reporters didn't overreact to a politician's telling the very same joke they routinely hear and tell in the city room, we'd get more humor.” quote by Robert Scheer](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/17c/robert-scheer-12420_american-politics_he-reagan-likes-to-tell-jokes-and-that-s_773713.jpg)
![“Am I lonely? Yes. Am I upset? Yes. Am I confused? Yes. Do I have my days when I've thrown a little pity party for myself? Absolutely. But I'm also doing really well. I'd be a robot if I said I didn't feel moments of anger, of hurt, of embarrassment... [but] You joke and say, 'What doesn't kill you…” quote by Jennifer Aniston](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/457/jennifer-aniston-1109_confused_am-i-lonely-yes-am-i-upset-yes-am-i-conf_2751646.jpg)
