Joke Quotes · Page 43

Sometimes, at parties, people demand I tell a joke. It's like pointing a gun at my feet and telling me to dance.

— Celia Rivenbark

There is no bad time to laugh. I always joke, even five minutes before a game. It's not bad to stay a…

— Kylian Mbappe

After more than half a century (Sleeping Beauty), Disney finally know what the meaning of true love (Maleficent).

— Alvin

Just because we wear hair extensions and make-up doesn't mean we're the punchline for every joke.

— Emily Atack

Death meant little to me. It was the last joke in a series of bad jokes.

— Charles Bukowski

Being broke is a joke, I never found it funny / That’s why I count my blessings / As much as I…

— Fabolous

I've heard every pie joke in the book. I'm still waiting for an original one.

— Jason Biggs

The joke we always say is that WWE doesn't pay us to wrestle, they pay us to travel.

— Seth Rollins

“it’s hard not to see. You’re the kind of pair that makes everyone around them feel as though they’re missing out on…

— Mackenzi Lee

“Some men would not still be HIV negative or alive, if they had managed to sleep with some of the women with…

— Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Comedy is all about the joke. Comedies usually don't do anything fancy with the camera [or] the lighting. It doesn't matter. It…

— Fede Alvarez

I have my friends who like me because I'm me and not because I'm in films, and that's really important to me.…

— Angourie Rice

“I read once that explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog," Mark said. "You find out how it works, but the…

— Cassandra Clare

There was a joke in Czechoslovakia: The Communist Party dance, it's one step forward, two steps backward, and everyone is still clapping.

— Martina Navratilova

Memes just show that people are engaged about something. A meme is just a little inside joke for a group of people…

— Anthony Fantano

I realised that all one really had to do was just observe. Observe and slightly exaggerate, and you had comedy. Instead of…

— Mel Brooks

“Bibi: Mi papá me dijo que esta vez no me va a apoyar con David Hasselhoff porque me estoy haciendo daño y…

— Mario Cantú Toscano

They all want to be me. They do! What everybody else says they will do, I've already been doing. They all want…

— Paul Broun

A sense of humor is rare. It isn't telling a joke about how there are three ways to get to heaven. It's…

— Rodney Dangerfield

I have had every hair color. I joke with my hair colorist. She keeps sheets of paper on every hair color that…

— Brittany Snow

There's always someone who's going to interpret my material as racist, but it's not. Racism comes from intent and power. A racist…

— Russell Peters

I hate to give myself credit for anything, but I will say I really enjoy, as an actor, and especially with comedy…

— Max Greenfield

Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around…

— Mark

“We humans are still a joke in this universe; we are not real, not yet! Universe can annihilate us in seconds! If…

— Mehmet Murat ildan

Haters are a joke..Because they begin with ha so I laugh at them

— Becca Smail

When See A Quaote About Fat Peaple It Says 908 up's and 263 down's. So That Means That 263 Fat Peaple Doesn't Like The Joke.

— Anonymous

Women. Can't live with them, can't finish this joke without having sex with them & then later sleep on couch.

— Nikhil Saluja

You're 37yrs old and you've not met your papa!!! All thank to your mama.

— Adaeze Agbai

When I did 'Spamalot,' the joke was that I was a foot taller than Tim Curry.

— Hannah Waddingham

A joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the…

— Penn Jillette

I like writing a joke, and I like when a joke works, and I like other comics who tell jokes.

— Dave Attell

Humor is based on surprise, and surprise is a milder way of saying shock. It's surprise that makes the joke.

— George Carlin

A joke is just a paintbrush. It takes someone funny to paint something beautiful.

— Andrew Schulz

My reputation as a ladies' man was a joke. It caused me to laugh bitterly through the 10,000 nights I spent alone.

— Leonard Cohen

If I can write a joke about something that happened that was awful, it's like OK that happened and I have this…

— Taylor Tomlinson

The producers want us to sell, sell, sell. That's my little joke. That's what we do by day; by night, we're artists.

— Mike Nichols

“Mystery is the face everybody shared before they were born and the joke they'll finally get after they're dead.”

— Tom Robbins

At nine, my mom used to tell me she saw an Olympic medalist in me. I used to take it as a…

— Saina Nehwal

“riddle is a challenge that is meant to be solved with reasoning whereas a joke is a setup for an amusing pun…

— Sef Daystrom

[Writing a joke] there is no team of writers. It's just you in an office, staring at yourself in the mirror.

— Jimmy Fallon