Funny SMS / Text Messages

Wats d height of hope??
It is: sittin in d exam hall,
holdin d question paper in hand
n tellin ur self
"dude,dnt worry.
Exams wil get postponed!"

1% of women under medication for mental illness

Statistics show that 1% of women in the world,
are on medication for mental illness
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So beware!

99% are running around
without proper medication!!

Better think before you smile.

1 smile = 1 friendship
1 friendship = 1 love
1 love = 1 proposal
1 proposal = 1 marriage
And 1 marriage = THOUSANDS of problem.
so better think before you smile.

An essay on cricket match

Teacher told all students
in a class to write an essay
on a cricket match.

All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote No match, due to rain!!!

Smile meanings

Smile to old means Respect

Smile to child mean Innocence

Smile to friend means Care

Smile in front of mobile, a mental case!

Still smiling? ;-)
Pagal ey oy

10 marks in an exam

Question: "How to kill an ant?"

Asked in an exam for 10 marks!

Student:
Mix chilli powder with sugar,
&
Keep it outside the ant's hole

After eating,
ant will search for some water near a water tank.
Push ant in to it!
Now ant will go to dry itself near fire,
When it reaches fire, put a bomb into d fire!
Then admit wounded ant in icu!
And then
remove oxygen mask from it's mouth and kill the ant :-|

Moral:
Don't play with students!
They can do any thing for 10 marks

How do u determine whether to admit a patient or not?

In a Mental Hospital a journalist asked the Doctor:
How do u determine whether to admit a patient or not?

Dr: Well, we first fill a BathTub & give a teaspoon, a glass & a bucket to the patient & ask them to empty the Bathtub....

Journalist: Oh, obviously a normal person would use d bucket bcoz its bigger....

Dr: NO, a normal person would pull the drain plug!
Now will u plz proceed to bed no.39 ;-)

A sardar prays daily for 2 hours

A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
"Hey vaheguru meri lottery lagady."

After 11 years VaheGuru angrily appeared
& said,"Khoti de putar 1 vari ticket te le ley"

Roses r red .. violts r blue

Roses r red,
violets r blue,
monkeys like you should be kept in the zoo.
Dont get angry,
you will find me there too,
not in the cage but laughing at you.
:D

This is my head.....

This is my head ....

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Itni dair dabanay k liyay thanks.
I am feeling much better now:-)