"Comedy clubs have brick walls behind the performer.……" — Mitch Hedberg
"Comedy clubs have brick walls behind the performer. Bricks make you funny. When I'm in front of a fireplace, I'm hilarious."
—
Mitch Hedberg
★
★
★
★
★
0.0 avg (0 ratings)
163 Quotes by Mitch Hedberg
Mitch Hedberg has 163 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
-
Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having.
-
Alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. Goddamn it Otto, you…
-
I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get…
-
I like rice. Rice is great if you're hungry and want 2000 of something picketing, but I don't know how…
-
Foosball screwed up my perception of soccer. I though you had to kick the ball and then spin around and…
-
If you drink O'Douls, you don't drink; but if you drink 20 O'Douls in a half hour, then you're a…
-
I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass…
-
What am I drinking? NyQuil on the rocks, for when you're feeling sick but sociable.
-
I wanna hang a map of the world in my house. Then I'm gonna put pins into all the locations…
-
I love my fed-ex guy cause he's a drug dealer and he don't even know it...and he's always on time.
-
Hell, yeah! Meeting adjourned!
-
Well, I was lost but now I live here! I have severely improved my predicament!
See all 163 quotes by Mitch Hedberg »
More Behind Quotes
This quote is filed under Behind Quotes,
one of 6,713 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
-
The structure of apartheid is still rooted in the Haitian society. When you have apartheid, you don't see those behind…
— Jean-Bertrand Aristide
-
I don't want to lie. I dislike dishonesty. And I work in Hollywood, a town and a business that relies…
— David Arquette
-
I've had trouble now and again in Nigeria because I have spoken up about the mistreatment of factions in the…
— Chinua Achebe
-
You will always have partial points of view, and you'll always have the story behind the story that hasn't come…
— Margaret Atwood
-
For behind all imperialism is ultimately the imperialistic individual, just as behind all peace is ultimately the peaceful individual.
— Irving Babbitt
-
Basically no, I mean I think that it's very easy to like I say, smoke a joint or even to…
— Lester Bangs
-
I almost died, secretly, behind closed doors.
— Stephen Baldwin
-
I don't get it when you get so much openness about the way movies are made, and the special effects…
— Christian Bale
-
Behind every great fortune lies a great crime.
— Honore de Balzac
-
I'm not such a big star. I am just a little planet. In Spain, people don't put so much attention…
— Antonio Banderas
-
I think we are living in selfish times. I'm the first one to say that I'm the most selfish. We…
— Javier Bardem
-
All changes are more or less tinged with melancholy, for what we are leaving behind is part of ourselves.
— Amelia Barr
See all 6,713 Behind Quotes »