"You don't use mayonnaise, why? ... Are you……" — Jim Gaffigan

You don't use mayonnaise, why? ... Are you addicted to mayonnaise? Is… - Jim Gaffigan

"You don't use mayonnaise, why? ... Are you addicted to mayonnaise? Is it okay if I use mayonnaise? I could go outside..."

— Jim Gaffigan

Addicted Quotes Go Quotes Go Outside Quotes I Use Quotes Inspirational Quotes Mayonnaise Quotes Okay Quotes Outside Quotes Use Quotes Why Quotes

99 Quotes by Jim Gaffigan

Jim Gaffigan has 99 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

Oh great, socks. You know I'm dying for your sins right? Yeah, but thanks for the socks! They'll go great…
Bacon bits are like the fairy dust of the food community.
There should be a children's song: 'If you're happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your…
Whenever one of my children says, 'Goodnight, Daddy,' I always think to myself, 'You don't mean that.
Hey, people who travel with their bed pillow. You look insane.
Failing and laughing at your own shortcomings are the hallmarks of a sane parent.
Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January.
It's so obvious The Weather Channel is pro hurricane. Fair and balanced my ass.
Thanksgiving. It's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. 'Hey, how…
Raising kids may be a thankless job with ridiculous hours, but at least the pay sucks.
There were times in my life when I had one thing to do all day, but I still couldn’t get…
If camping is so great, why are the bugs always trying to get in your house?

See all 99 quotes by Jim Gaffigan »

More Addicted Quotes

This quote is filed under Addicted Quotes, one of 475 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

We are addicted to our egotism, our likes and dislikes and prejudices, and depend upon them for our own sense… — Karen Armstrong
Communications technology changes possibilities for communication, but that doesn't mean it changes the inherited structure of the brain. So you… — Margaret Atwood
Shockingly, a University of Pennsylvania study says the number of young people addicted to gambling - largely due to increased… — Spencer Bachus
'Hello my name is the Republican Party and I got a problem. I'm addicted to spending and big government.' I'd… — Glenn Beck
A company shouldn't get addicted to being shiny, because shiny doesn't last. — Jeff Bezos
Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense. — Ambrose Bierce
There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying. — Josh Billings
Saddam Hussein is a homicidal dictator who is addicted to weapons of mass destruction. — George W. Bush
I have photographs taken of me at the time I was addicted, and thought I looked good. I see them… — Kirstie Alley
It is not I who become addicted, it is my body. — Jean Cocteau
Man cannot live without joy; therefore when he is deprived of true spiritual joys it is necessary that he become… — Thomas Aquinas
I knew it was really, really popular when my granny told me she watched it, and was addicted. When your… — Davina McCall

See all 475 Addicted Quotes »