« All Them Quotes · Jerry Seinfeld's Page
Them Quotes by Jerry Seinfeld
- If aliens are watching us through telescopes, they're going to think the dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms,…
- I have no plants in my house. They won't live for me. Some of them don't even wait to die, they commit suicide.
- One day I was watching these construction workers go back to work. I was watching them kind of trudging down the street. It was like…
- You know why dogs have no money? No pockets. 'Cause they see change on the street all the time and it's driving them crazy. When…
- There is no such thing as an attention span. There is only the quality of what you are viewing. This whole idea of an attention…
- People have an infinite attention span if you are entertaining them.
- The greatest thing about being a comedian is knowing other comedians. And you get to talk to them. Its the most fun.
- The Beatles created something that never trailed off. What a gift that was to their fans. If you're into the Beatles, you loved them from…
- The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a war. Pretty impressive. Also pretty lucky for them. Ever seen that little Swiss Army…
- What is this obsession people have with books? They put them in their houses like they're trophies. What do you need it for after you…
- Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for…
More Them Quotes
- Poets are the only people to whom love is not only a crucial, but an indispensable experience, which entitles them to mistake… — Hannah Arendt
- A high heart ought to bear calamities and not flee them, since in bearing them appears the grandeur of the mind and… — Pietro Aretino
- If you want to annoy your neighbors, tell the truth about them. — Pietro Aretino
- Flattery and deceit are the darlings of great men, and so with these men spread the butter on thick, if you want… — Pietro Aretino
- As we all know, many people remain buried under tons of rubble and debris, waiting to be rescued. When we think of… — Jean-Bertrand Aristide
- Those who educate children well are more to be honored than they who produce them; for these only gave them life, those… — Aristotle
- In a democracy the poor will have more power than the rich, because there are more of them, and the will of… — Aristotle
- Jealousy is both reasonable and belongs to reasonable men, while envy is base and belongs to the base, for the one makes… — Aristotle