Penis Quotes
116 Penis quotes by 65 unique authors
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Women are from stars, men are from penis.
— Vanna Bonta
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I could never make up my mind to get married so my penis decided for me.
— Sigourney Weaver
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I once made love to a female clown, and she twisted my penis into a poodle.
— Unknown Author
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Beware of the man who denounces women writers; his penis is tiny and he cannot spell.
— Erica Jong
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Poetry, the genre of purest beauty, was born of a truncated woman: her head severed from her body with a sword, a symbolic penis.
— Andrea Dworkin
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If a girl calls me a pussy my penis will fuck her up, cause it's one hardcore mother fucker.
— Nikhil Saluja
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My penis is like a gun, when I set it to 'semi' the pussy cums 'automatic'.
— Nikhil Saluja
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My penis always ends up in the eye of the beholder.
— Nikhil Saluja
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In case you're wondering, last night I had a dream that my penis got chronically depressed and decided to commit suicide.
— Nikhil Saluja
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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. Mother, where do babies come from? The mother thinks…
— Kevin
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I like to make chicks laugh so hard they accidentally put my penis into their mouth.
— Nikhil Saluja
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Girls go to Mars to get more candy bars, boys go to Venus to play with their penis.
— Nikhil Saluja
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My penis is an awkward leprechaun that had not gotten lucky nearly as much as it had gotten bored.
— Andrea Gibson
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I might go to heaven, I might go to hell But at least I know my cum doesn't smell And if I ever drafted Brandon…
— Trace Adkins
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THOUGHT OF THE DAY!!!no woman will ever be truly happy,because no man will ever have a chocolate penis that ejaculates money!
— Sarah Moores
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Attention men! Your penis is not Pinocchio's nose! It will not get bigger if you lie!
— Sarah Moores
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Penis ^_^
— Ashley
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Penis breath, a lover's dread is what you get when you give head. Unpleasant as it tends to be be grateful that he doesn't pee.…
— Unkown
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Everything with me is either worship and passion or pity and understanding. I hate rarely, though when I hate, I hate murderously. For example now,…
— SangFroid Stalker
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Life is to short. So is your penis.
— Camilia
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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Never mind, it's too long.
— Patience Jr Kibabatoko
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A Man's penis is so polite. It stands up so girls have a place to sit down.
— Green Monk
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Happiness Is Like Penis. It Always Looks Small But When You Learn To Share It, You Realize How Big It Can Be.
— Green Monk
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It's difficult for me to tell whether girls like me for who I am as a person. Damn my incredibly massive penis.
— Green Monk
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My penis wants to slam dance at your vagina concert.
— Green Monk
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Who Wrote These Penis Quotes
65 authors contributed a total of 116 Penis Quotes, led by these top contributors: