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Honking Quotes by Jack Handy
1 Honking quote by Jack Handy
More Quotes by Jack Handy
Jack Handy has 25 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:
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It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I guess that's what I like about it.…
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And after you're real drunk, maybe go down to the public park and stagger around and ask people for money, and then…
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I think one way the cops could make money would be to hold a murder weapons sale. Many people could really use…
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The tired and thirsty prospector threw himself down at the edge of the watering hole and started to drink. But then he…
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As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was…
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Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate…
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Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
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If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go, because, man, they're gone.
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One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run with wooden stakes.
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If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like now.
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I'd like to see a nude opera, because when they hit those high notes, I bet you can really see it in…
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I get a lot of teenagers going, 'Yo, Krueger,' and honking their horn and giving me the claw. Yeah, I'm recognized.
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As the light changed from red to greeen to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was…
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I broke my nose in gym when a ball hit me. I took a girl to her debutante ball the next week…
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In the world outside this glass room, songbirds are feeding and resting in the trees. Some will take off tonight and not…
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I read with keen interest the words of a bumper sticker readily visible on the highly polished chrome bumper of a car…
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I lay my head on the wheel and the horn begins honking, the whole neighborhood knows that I'm home drunk again.
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Unwanted honking not only irritates others, but may also end up causing accidents. Drivers lose cool and it may result in road…
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The shortest unit of time in the multiverse is the New York Second, defined as the period of time between the traffic…
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As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red again, I sat there thinking about life. Was…
— Jack Handy
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