« All Function Quotes · Dave Barry's Page
Function Quotes by Dave Barry
- Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.
- In the Bowling Alley of Tomorrow, there will even be machines that wear rental shoes and throw the ball for you. Your sole function will…
- The most valuable function performed by the federal government is entertainment.
- Without computers, the government would be unable to function at the level of effectiveness and efficiency that we have come to expect. . . .…
- A critical function that we journalists perform at political conventions is to try to get into parties that we have not been invited to. There…
- Socially prominent people are very fond of disease, because it gives them a chance to have these really elaborate charity functions, and the newspaper headlines…
- The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitution - to spew out paper.
More Function Quotes
- You can't fall back on the private sector and say, 'You take care of the nation's banking system.' That's a fundamental function… — Dick Cheney
- Ministers of the Gospel are excluded [from serving as Visitors of the county Elementary Schools] to avoid jealousy from the other sects,… — Thomas Jefferson
- I would like a world full of love. But remember, that love has no opposite to it. It is simply because you… — Rajneesh
- Once upon a time ... the only autonomous intelligences we humans knew of were us humans. We thought then that if humankind… — Dan Simmons
- The way to have good and safe government is not to trust it all to one, but to divide it among the… — Thomas Jefferson
- Most people who meet my wife quickly conclude that she is remarkable. They are right about this. She is smart, funny and… — Barack Obama
- Anything which is a living and not a dying body... will have to be an incarnate will to power, it will strive… — Friedrich Nietzsche
- So let it be a criterion if you follow the path of awareness, let love be the criterion. When your awareness suddenly… — Rajneesh