"The primary function of the government is -……" — Dave Barry
"The primary function of the government is - and here I am quoting directly from the U.S. Constitution - to spew out paper."
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Dave Barry
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508 Quotes by Dave Barry
Dave Barry has 508 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.
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Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.
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Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.
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Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the…
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The Democrats seem to be basically nicer people, but they have demonstrated time and again that they have the management…
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'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.
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The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look…
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We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it, but we cannot figure out…
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The word user is the word used by the computer professional when they mean idiot.
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The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.
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Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers…
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Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only…
See all 508 quotes by Dave Barry »
More Constitution Quotes
This quote is filed under Constitution Quotes,
one of 1,691 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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A constitution is the arrangement of magistracies in a state.
— Aristotle
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The Constitution is government's stop sign. It says, you - the three branches of government - can go so far…
— Michele Bachmann
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People were floored when they saw that the underwear bomber, after less than 50 minutes of interrogation, was given the…
— Michele Bachmann
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What I don't like is judges legislating from the bench. And as president of the United States, I will appoint…
— Michele Bachmann
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Government is necessary for our survival. We need government in order to survive. The Founding Fathers created a special place…
— Michael Badnarik
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I mean, the Constitution of this country was written 200 years ago. The house I was living in in Madrid…
— Antonio Banderas
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Despite two decisions, in 2008 and 2010, by the U.S. Supreme Court unequivocally affirming that the Second Amendment to the…
— Bob Barr
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Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any…
— John Adams
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All the perplexities, confusion and distress in America arise, not from defects in their Constitution or Confederation, not from want…
— John Adams
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The liberties of our country, the freedom of our civil constitution, are worth defending against all hazards: And it is…
— Samuel Adams
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Progressivism is the cancer in America and it is eating our Constitution, and it was designed to eat the Constitution,…
— Glenn Beck
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A cloudy day or a little sunshine have as great an influence on many constitutions as the most recent blessings…
— Joseph Addison
See all 1,691 Constitution Quotes »