Condom Quotes

136 Condom quotes by 104 unique authors

Ranger cradled my face in his hands, using his thumbs to wipe the tears from my eyes. "The ceremony is over. Can you make it… — Janet Evanovich
Bracelets with white symbols?” Michael made the question casual; in fact, he bent his head and concentrated on tuning his guitar, not that it needed… — Rachel Caine
Since i couldn't remember the "real" first time i'd lost my virginity, this would have become my de facto first time. I wanted a better… — Gabrielle Zevin
The condom broke. I know how stupid that sounds. It's the reproductive version of the dog ate my homework. — Jennifer Weiner
I could become a nun even if I am a non-believer. I'll learn to fake it like Nick did with me. I will minister the… — Rachel Cohn
I bought a packet of Trojan® Ultra Pleasure Extra Sensitive condoms: ‘No. 1 in AMERICA’. They smell nothing like a positive first sexual experience. — Joe Dunthorne
Five trolls in a dra-a-a-a-ag,' the four-inch man sang from my shoulder. 'Four purple condoms, three French ticklers, two horny vamps and a succubus in… — Kim Harrison
I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog is to use… — Bill Maher
I brought a condom," I tell her when I slide her panties down. We're both hot and sweaty, and I can't resist hr anymore. "I… — Simone Elkeles
Do you happen to have another Condom? I think I've discovered the cure for headaches. — Stephen King
You know, we are one nation under a god. Yes, you were right. An angry, crack slinging god who decorates with bullets and spent condoms. — Henry Rollins
Logan, why aren't you wearing protection?" The radio crackled, and then came Logan's voice. "I have 'protection' in my bag," he said. "But as much… — Jill Shalvis
Have you ever heard of a condom? Don't Carpathians have condoms? Because I'm thinking that if you're all that worried, a condom might be just… — Christine Feehan
They’ll have to eat first. And by the time they’re finished, you’ll be back.” “With the condoms.” “Right.” “For the giant orgy you’re convinced we’re… — Karen Chance
you gotta think it’s a waste of—” “Ray!” I glanced around, but there was nobody within earshot. “Well, excuse me if I’m not used to… — Karen Chance
So, did the costume come with a condom, or is that sold separately? — Rachel Vincent
Instead of lowering your head and copping to it like a man, you pick up the journal as one might hold a bady's beshattered diaper,… — Junot Diaz
You know, the condom is the glass slipper of our generation. You slip it on when you meet a stranger. You dance all night, then… — Chuck Palahniuk
I didn't lose my virginity until I was 18. The first time was a nightmare. Who shows you how to use a condom? — Adam Ant
You should wear a condom on your head because if your gunna act like a dick might as well dress like one. — Nikhil Saluja
Not finishing what you start is like... Opening a condom and not using it. — Cv Pillay
...condom says to the tampon, You put me out of a job for 1 week a month! The tampon replies, When you don't do your… — Unknown Author
If abortion is murder, then condom should be kidnapper... :) — Unknown Author
Live today like it's your last day on earth. But pay your bills and use Condom just in case it's not — Unknown Author
I am going to buy you a condom coz if u r going to act like a dick you should be dressed like one. — Vedica

Who Wrote These Condom Quotes

104 authors contributed a total of 136 Condom Quotes, led by these top contributors: