All P.J. O'Rourke Quotes
- Anything that makes your mother cry is fun Cry
- Who does Bill Clinton think got off the boat and stepped on Plymouth Rock? Peace Corps volunteers? Bill
- I believe that Western civilization, after some disgusting glitches, has become almost civilized. I believe it is our first duty to protect that civilization. I… Become Almost
- The real slums are another matter. The bad parts of Tondo are as bad as any place I've seen, ancient, filthy houses swarmed with the… Ancient
- You'll note that politicians no longer spend money, they invest it. Don't worry about paying more to the [IRS]. You aren't being taxed; you're taking… Fly
- Man developed in Africa. He has not continued to do so there. Africa
- Health care is too expensive, so the Clinton administration is putting a high-powered coporate lawyer - Hillary - in charge of making it cheaper. (This… Administration
- You can't get good chinese takeout in China and cuban cigars are rationed in Cuba. That's all you need to know about communism. All
- To grasp the true meaning of socialism, imagine a world where everything is designed by the post office, even the sleaze. Designed
- Coffee and cigarettes are much better if you want an instant breakfast. Better
- One nice thing about the Third World, you don't have to fasten your seat belt. (Or stop smoking. Or cut down on saturated fats.) It… Average
- Never Refuse Wine. It is an odd but universally held opinion that anyone who doesn't drink must be an alcoholic. Alcoholic
- A woman should dress to attract attention. To attract the most attention, a woman should be either nude, or wearing something as expensive as getting… Attention
- The interesting thing about staring down a gun barrel is how small the hole is where the bullet comes out, yet what a big difference… Barrel
- Well the planet I've got a chance to visit is Earth, and Earth's principal features are chaos and war. I think I'd be a fool… Chance
- The founding fathers, in their wisdom, devised a method by which our republic can take one hundred of its most prominent numbskulls and keep them… Actual
- How did an allegedly free people spawn a vast, rampant cuttlefish of dominion with its tentacles in every orifice of the body politic? Allegedly
- I can understand why mankind hasn't given up war. During a war you get to drive tanks through the sides of buildings and shoot foreigners… Building
- Armenians and Azerbaijanis in Stepanakert, capital of the Nagorno-Karabakh autonomous region, rioted over much needed spelling reform in the Soviet Union. Armenians
- Politics should be limited in scope to ware, protection of property, and the occasional precautionary beheading of a member of the ruling class. Beheading