All Ogden Nash Quotes
- A bit of talcum Is always walcum. Bit
- I test my bath before I sit, And I'm always moved to wonderment That what chills the finger not a bit Is so frigid upon… Always Moved
- I don't care how unkind the things people say about me so long as they don't say them to my face. Care
- A lady wants to be dressed exactly like everybody else but she gets pretty up- set if she sees anybody else dressed exactly like her. Anybody
- The burnt child, urged by rankling ire, Can hardly wait to get back at the fire. Burnt
- One would be in less danger From the wiles of the stranger If one's own kin and kith Were more fun to be with. Danger
- When I ponder my mind I consistently find It is glued On food. Consistently
- Another good thing about gossip is that it is within everybody's reach, And it is much more interesting than any other form of speech. Another Good
- O thrice unhappy home Whose master doesn't know the difference between a watt and an ohm! Difference
- To love is an active verb. Active
- A husband is a man who two minutes after his head touches the pillow is snoring like an overloaded omnibus. Head
- But children, hark! Your mother would rather, When you arrived, have been your father. Arrived
- The old men know when an old man dies. Age
- When a lady's erotic life is vexed God knows what God is coming next. Coming
- Neath tile or thatch That man is rich Who has a scratch For every itch. Every Itch
- One bliss for which There is no match Is when you itch To up and scratch. Bliss
- A cough is something that you yourself cant help, but everybody else does on purpose just to torment you. Cant
- Then blessings on thee, my afternoon torpor Thou makest a prince of a mental porpor. Afternoon
- But all ladies think they weigh too much. All
- How Sunday into Monday melts! Inspirational
- Authors of all races, be they Greeks, Romans, Teutons, or Celts, Can't seem just to say anything is the thing it is but have to… All
- If you are really Master of your Fate, it shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate. Any
- The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift. Becomes
- I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so… Been
- Here is a pen and here is a pencil, here's a typewriter, here's a stencil, here's a list of today's appointments, and all the flies… All