Best Lewis Black Words
- You want to know what it's like to be on a plane for 22 hours? Sit in a chair, squeeze your head as hard as… Air
- When from behind me, a young woman of 25 uttered the following, it was the dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life until… Behind
- Valentine's Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don't have a special someone, you're alone. Alone
- The last person to get across that town in under three hours was yelling "The British are coming! The British are coming!" Across
- Just relax and breathe through your ass. Ass
- That's the funny thing about religion: it doesn't matter what you say, you're going to upset someone. Funny
- Should I eat this or should I eat this? Well, I'll have to eat both! Both
- In a series of wonderful essays, Evan Handler gives himself up to us - warts and all. To our amusement and bemusement we share in… All
- Earth Day was created because we were doing a lot of drugs, more drugs than you could ever f@*! imagine. And so we came up… Came
- If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college. College
- What is the difference between a Democrat and a Republican? A Democrat blows, a Republican sucks. Blow
- I am Batman. That's who I am, who are you? Batman
- Stupid presidents, smart presidents, white presidents, black presidents -- doesn't work! What this country needs is a crazy Third World dictator. And Donald Trump has… Already Got
- Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.' Came
- Glenn Beck is offended! Glenn Beck thinks playing the Nazi card is going too far. Glenn Beck. this is a guy who uses more Swastika… Beck
- The only thing dumber than a Democrat or a Republican is when those pricks work together. You see, in our two-party system, the Democrats are… Bad
- It's 'Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, except there's just one degree, and Kevin Bacon is Hitler. Can I play? Let's see. Mother Teresa had a… Bacon
- I was home alone watching George Bush speak on television. So it was just really the two of us. And as I listened to him,… Alone
- This is what I've been waiting for my whole life. A President who's not afraid to tell the truth about being a lying a**hole. Afraid
- The one thing I think we learned this year is that the Democrats and the Republicans are completely worthless. Completely
- Since there are so many idiots out there, you may actually start to think you're crazy. You are not. They are idiots. Actually Start
- Now, they say that New Zealand is beautiful and I do not know -- because after 22 hours on a plane any landmass would be… Any
- Mother Teresa had a mustache. Hitler had a mustache. Mother Teresa is Hitler. Hitler
- My favorite health club is the International House of Pancakes Club
- MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken! Chicken
More Ways to Read Lewis Black Quotes
- Best Lewis Black Quotes (Lewis Black Quotes)
- Best Lewis Black Sayings (Lewis Black Quotes)
- Best Lewis Black Quotations (Lewis Black Quotes)
- Best Lewis Black Lines (Lewis Black Quotes)
- Best Lewis Black Thoughts (Lewis Black Quotes)