Best Jeff Foxworthy Sayings
- I know if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. Family
- If you own a home with wheels on it and several cars without, you just might be a redneck. Car
- There's no down time any more. Any
- Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're… Changing
- Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it? Ever Seen
- Did you know babies are nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt? Babies
- Between New York and LA, there's 200 million people that aren't hip, and they don't want to be hip. Hip
- For the first time ever I was taking the family on the road. We stayed with my in-laws, which on life's list of experiences ranks… Dysfunctional Family
- My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking… Car
- Being a comedian, people tell me stuff they shouldn't tell their therapist. Comedian
- Country music is about new love and it's about old love. Country
- If men have a smell it's usually an accident. Accident
- It's a weird sensation to be mad and learning at the same time. Funny
- My father-in-law gets up at 5 o'clock in the morning and watches the Discovery Channel. I don't know why there's this big rush to do… Big
- Now, it's true I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been givin' me lately. Been
- I had to perform at the White House for the president, That's always kind of a weird set to try to put together. Always Kind
- I love comedy. God has given me this platform. Comedy
- Nothing in life prepares you to be famous. Fame
- What I hated was doing what somebody in LA thought Jeff Foxworthy ought to do. Foxworthy
- When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain. Brain
- I turned down a movie this summer because it was nine weeks in Vancouver and my oldest daughter is 14. I've got four more summers… Away Nine
- I've been to all 50 states, and traveled this whole country, and 90 percent of the people are good folks. The rest of them take… All
- I tried real hard to play golf, and I was so bad at it they would have to check me for ticks at the end… Bad
- People would say, Can we develop a sitcom around you? and I would say, Not interested. I'm very happy doing standup and writing and taking… Aggravation
- You know, I remember Career Day in high school. I remember plumbers and lawyers... I don't remember a booth where you could sign up to… Airplane
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