Dane Cook Quotes

101 quotes in 1258 categories

• You've gotta share what's going on in your mind.
• Anger has a way of seeping into every other emotion and planting itself in there.
• I grew up very self-loathing. I was a phobic. I had anxiety. I had panic attacks.
• I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.
• If you use tact you can say anything, then make it funny.
• I'm glad that my parents missed one thing that was really unbelievable. They saw me hit this great success. It was a blast and we…
• I don't write any of my material down. I like to improvise and be spontaneous.
• I feel like I was born and bred to stay self-motivated. I'm not one of those people who ho-hums and feels sorry for himself when…
• My fam is just a regular family. But all of them have great senses of humor.
• We all hope for breakthrough rebirth moments.
• My mom and dad passed away from cancer. Within nine months, I lost both of my folks. Immediately after that, I had a horrible betrayal…
• Christina can sing all the notes, but Britney is just hot!
• I always thought that if I got no love at all early in my standup career, or I was god awful, I thought I'd get…
• I can always get better. A lot of my ex-girlfriends don't think I'm funny.
• I can do more than just stand-up comedy, and the only way I'll be able to show that is if I do it myself. Because…
• I did stand-up comedy for seventeen years. I need to explore other things.
• I don't know if I could rebuild an airplane engine, but I know a little bit about rotors and rivets.
• I had never done a roast, but I really wanted to, because it's so different from standup.
• I like to play guitar, jam out, play the blues, go watch movies. I love movies.
• I work with a lot of kids. Every year, for the past fifteen years, I work at Comedy Camp where I work with a lot…

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