All Andy Rooney Quotes
- I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran. Arms
- Nothing in fine print is ever good news. Ever Good
- Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that… Classroom
- My own time is passing fast enough without some national game to help it along. Along
- The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians. Inspirational
- When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper. Aged
- As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book. Book
- I don't pick subjects as much as they pick me. Inspirational
- The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men. Always Tries
- The dullest Olympic sport is curling, whatever 'curling' means. Curling
- I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out… Bureau
- The world must be filled with unsuccessful musical careers like mine, and it's probably a good thing. We don't need a lot of bad musicians… Air
- Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which… Ballet
- Let's make a statement to the airlines just to get their attention. We'll pick a week next year and we'll all agree not to go… Agree
- Taxes are important. President Bush's tax proposals leave no rich person behind. Voters approve of President Bush helping the kind of people they wish they… Approve
- I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many people think it's… Eat
- The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame… Account
- I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return… All
- I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and… Both
- I obviously have a knack for getting on paper what a lot of people have thought and didn't realize they thought. And they say, 'Hey,… Hey
- Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there… Age
- My mother always called me 'sturdy' and said I have big bones. A little fat is what I am. Always Called
- Writers don't often say anything that readers don't already know, unless its a news story. A writer's greatest pleasure is revealing to people things they… Already Know
- I'm always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by. Go
- One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too… American