For those who woke up in a Fussy mood this morning do me a favor, punch your spouse in their fucking face. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Raillery is a mode of speaking in favor of one's wit at the expense of one's better nature. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for… — Rodney Dangerfield Copy Share Image
You know you're on your period when everyone around you has an attitude problem. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Never let your Ladys mind wonder. its too little to be out on its own — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
One of the great mysteries of life is how a man can leave his car keys in the refrigerator. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
When you talk yourself, you think how witty, how original, how acute you are; but when another does so, you are very… — Ouida Copy Share Image
Once children learn how to learn, nothing is going to narrow their mind. The essence of teaching is to make learning contagious,… — Marva Collins Copy Share Image
There will always be people out there that will bitch behind your back & judge you and your life. For some people… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food, and few things in the world are more wearying than a sarcastic attitude… — Agnes Repplier Copy Share Image
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back… — Mae West Copy Share Image
Clever, witty and absorbing, Amortality is a much-needed anatomy of our profound malaise about ageing. Its charms will never fade. — David Baddiel Copy Share Image
Being a journalist is good if you want to write books: it teaches you to get beyond the blank screen. My books… — Sophie Kinsella Copy Share Image
