Twitter Quotes · Page 80

“To a man with an internet connection, every thought and every movement sounds like a tweet or status update.”

— Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Crisis: When dinner is ready, I CRISIS, and my sister comes running.

— Nikhil Saluja

Wives are funny creatures. They don`t have sex with their husbands for weeks and then they want to kill the woman who…

— Nikhil Saluja

I log off because I'm bored but then I log back on after 5 minutes because I'm bored!

— Anonymous

Sex can lead to nasty things like herpes, gonorrhea, and relationships.

— Nikhil Saluja

When you try to be different, you are being like everyone else. Being yourself is what makes you different.

— Nikhil Saluja

Almost considered doing something with my life, but then I sat down and logged into Twitter.

— Anonymous

I just wanna say one thing.

— Nikhil Saluja

Twitter is important, but it's not more important than protecting your soul.

— Melanie Scrofano

I do see an interest in writing for Twitter.

— Lydia Davis

The most precious thing we have is life. Yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.

— Nikhil Saluja

I don't understand this whole Twitter, Facebook stuff. I don't get it. Make a phone call. Talk to somebody.

— James Avery

I never knew you could offend someone by masturbating. This couple just opened their closet and they look really pissed.

— Nikhil Saluja

You will be judged on how you live your life, but I will also be judged on how I treat you

— Tiffany F

HUSBAND, FAITHFUL, That man who is married to a trusting wife (a definition that can be either truthful or cynical)

— Nikhil Saluja

Once you get my snark going, I'll just start snarking it up all over Twitter.

— Ato Essandoh

I don't have a great sense of humor, but I do have a great sense of nonsense.

— Nikhil Saluja

There are some people whose Twitter feeds are works of art. They intuitively understand how much of themselves to put out there.

— Jess Walter

That's my dick. Not my arm.

— Nikhil Saluja

K is the shortest way to spell FUCK YOU !

— Nikhil Saluja

I hate it when I do something like a ninja and there is nobody around to see!

— Nikhil Saluja

In the best cases, Twitter makes people smarter and faster and more efficient.

— Evan Williams

Now, Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is what separates us from the animals. Except the weasel.

— Nikhil Saluja

Tears running down my face like rain, who would have ever thought that love would come with so much pain.

— Nikhil Saluja

LOVE, that emotion which is not true until returned;

— Nikhil Saluja