Turtles hate heights. They don't even like being a few feet off the ground. It's the main reason they have resisted evolution… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer. . .a… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Kayso, it turns out that driving an actual car is way harder than it is in 'Grand Theft Auto: Zombie Hooker Smackdown. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
...One time you take a hundred thousand dollars and let a vampire go, the whole world turns on you like you're some… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
That's the scary thing about hope," she said. "If you let it go too long it turns into faith. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Love them all," said Renoir. "That is the secret, young man. Love them all." The painter let go of his arm and shrugged. "Then,… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I tried cutting myself to express my heartbreak over Tommy (Lord Flood) rejecting me, but OMFG it hurts like flaming fuck.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
Canada is a myth people made up to entertain children, like the Tooth Fairy. There’s no such place. — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“I hope you are not here to ask me to do my bawdy business- the monkey has a nosebleed and the circus, sir, is… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“The night was crisp and the stars shone with a cold blue light like loneliness or infinity.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“Abby Von Normal - And I'm like, "Don't change the subject, Kung Pao, what I want to know is if you're ready to spend… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“You can't just go around blurting out the truth like a prophet with Tourette's syndrome.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
“…turning your ankle hurts like hell, even if you're a superhero.” — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
