I will love to get a look under her hood, to see what size her engine is, it look & sounds like… — Glen Rambharack Copy Share Image
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I hate it when I have a tweet in my head and my friends doesn't retweet it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
They say shitting is call of nature…does that means FARTING is a misscall!! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Going to gym really sucks. But I calculated, and there's a good news - I only have to go 9,972 times before… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
BRB Have to run to the toilet, but I'll be back in two shakes of a man's penis. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Your face is fine, but puh-leeeze could you put a bag over your personality? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
So your name is Will, But you don't call your crotch The Willderness, then what the fuck? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If you convince me to make me think WHAT THE FUCK you instantly get a retweet. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I texted my girlfriend a picture of my flaccid penis. I just wanted to let her know I was thinking about her. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Someone is always gonna talk about you.. so you might as well give them something to talk about — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Only a true friend will tell you to your face, what others are saying behind your back! — Abhishek Tiwari Copy Share Image
You can't stop people from talking about you, but you can give them something to talk about. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can hate me all you want, but you don't have the right to talk shit about me. — Ngan Hoai Tran Vo Copy Share Image
A nice thick ting like you girl and you don't have a Man? What is wrong with you? Like your legs can't… — Glen Rambharack Copy Share Image
Cocks are a lot like ovens. You would rather a woman was operating it but sometimes you have to use it yourself. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
God gave us the miracle of life - sustaining water, & we turned it into Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi & Vodka. Good job, Morons. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Some people's noses and feet are built backwards: their feet smell and their noses run. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I wonder if your ass is jealous of the shit that comes out of your mouth. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The rumors you heard about me may be true. But then again they might be as FAKE as the bitch that told… — Ashley Rosales Copy Share Image
If I ask to suck your boobs when I wake up, does that count as sleeping like a baby? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I read the newspaper every day just to see if there's anyone I know in the obituaries or the underwear ads. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Like your Mom was a Poet Girl? I see you take after her with your lyrics !! — Glen Rambharack Copy Share Image
Plz don't sit around and run yo mouth about me..find something else to do with your time. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People are going to talk no matter what you do, so you might as well give them something to talk about. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I have a computer, a vibrator, & pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
How about this, you remove Funny/Model from your bio and let me be the judge of that. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
One of the great mysteries of life is how a man can leave his car keys in the refrigerator. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
BITCH, how bout you put some sand in your vagina, make them crabs feel more at home. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I said What did I do this time? I really meant What did you catch me doing? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
There are no relationship problems that can't be solved through suitable application of high explosives. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
