Redneck Quotes · Page 9

You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item.

— Jeff Foxworthy

I've been a radical for a long time. I guess it's too bad. I'd be more marketable as a right-wing redneck.

— Kris Kristofferson

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you've ever stared at a can of orange juice because it said concentrate.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if the receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you use a radiator hose to fix your kitchen sink.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you've ever stood in line to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if there are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.

— Jeff Foxworthy

When somebody like Elvis Costello comes along, anybody can make a good record with him.

— Nick Lowe

You might be a redneck if motel 6 turns off the lights when they see you coming.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your grandmother has ever been asked to leave a bingo game because of her language.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your mother has been involved in a fist fight at a high school sports event.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If I were scared of rednecks, I would've moved on a long time ago. That's not a fear I struggle with.

— Mike Cooley

You might be a redneck if you move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.

— Jeff Foxworthy

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

— Steven Wright

You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.

— Jeff Foxworthy

How is a redneck divorce similar to a tornado? You know that somewhere, somehow, someone is gonna lose a trailer.

— Jeff Foxworthy

A redneck water slide is when you just get a tarp out there, You just put baby oil and some soap on…

— Honey Boo Boo Child

“He rolled his eyes at me. “Fuck that. You go without me, I’ll just follow you.” “You’re more Marine than a Marine.”…

— Barbara Nickless

“So you can shoot?” “Yeah. My dad taught me. Won a few competitions when I was younger. Farmer’s Daughters of America.” “Sounds…

— T.M. Frazier

Because I lived in construction towns, we had a lot of workers who came from the South. They were all white, and,…

— Tom Brokaw

You might be a redneck if...you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare…

— Jeff Foxworthy

I met Elvis first in Las Vegas. I think I was appearing with Tom Jones and he came backstage to say hello…

— Norm Crosby

You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your wife keeps a can of Vienna sausage in her purse.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you think that beef jerky and Moon Pies are two of the major food groups.

— Jeff Foxworthy

Elvis couldn't leave the hotel except under heavy guard. It was incredible how they went wild over him.

— Minnie Pearl

You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...you've been on TV more than 5 times describing the sound of a tornado.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you watch cartoons long after your kids get bored.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you consider your license plate personalized because your dad made it in prison.

— Jeff Foxworthy

Elvis Presley, The Everly Brothers, and a lot of American artists were my greatest influences.

— Gordon Waller