It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Don't tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don't tell them where they know the fish. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If the statistics are right, the Jews constitute but one percent of the human race. It suggests a nebulous dim puff of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I am aware that I am very old now; but I am also aware that I have never been so young as… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It is a gratification to me to know that I am ignorant of art... Because people who understand art find nothing in… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Satan (impatiently) to Newcomer: The trouble with you Chicago people is, that you think you are the best people down here; whereas… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I always did hate for anyone to know what my plans or hopes or prospects werefor, if I kept people in ignorance… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
History teaches us that whenever a weak and ignorant people possess a thing which a strong and enlightened people want, it must… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. Fanatics will never learn that, though it be written in letters of gold across… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A cat is more intelligent than people believe, and can be taught any crime. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
You can never find a Christian who has acquired this valuable knowledge, this saving knowledge, by any process but the everlasting and… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
My mind changes often ... People who have no mind can easily be steadfast and firm, but when a man is loaded… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is nothing but that frail breastwork of earth between the people and destruction. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
But in this country we have one great privilege which they don't have in other countries. When a thing gets to be… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Such is professional jealousy; a scientist will never show any kindness for a theory which he did not start himself. There is… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The more you join with people in their joys and their sorrows, the more nearer and dearer they come to be to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
In forgiving, people are not being asked to forget. On the contrary, it is important to remember, so that we should not… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
We are always hearing of people who are around seeking after the Truth. I have never seen a (permanent) specimen. I think… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I know all those people. I have friendly, social, and criminal relations with the whole lot of them. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Begin with the determination to succeed and the work is half done already. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
