People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
Rich people don't pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes - they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I don't know that I appreciate things more because of how I grew up, but I am very realistic with what I… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I think we're getting to the point where everyone's getting fat and everyone's getting allergic, or claims to be allergic to something… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I am not agnostic. I am atheist. I don’t think there is no God; I know there’s no God. I know there’s… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
[Giving welfare to poor people] is the equivalent of the government sending [fat people] a jumbo bag of Bugles in the mail… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
If you're conservative in Hollywood, you're on a list of people who need to be put in their place. — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money. Chicks love dudes who are… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I am semi-ambivalent about being on camera - sort of low-key. I don't like being on camera stuff that much. I like… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
“One of the classier features of this home was the padded toilet seat. It was high-mileage puffy brown vinyl-colored foam and made that weird… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I'm really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life...so, something that is potentially four months down the road is… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work,… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings. — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
“But our leaders can’t tell the truth. We won’t let them. We’ve created a society where the politicians aren’t allowed to criticize the people.… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I cook a little bit. I make a Hungarian dish called chicken paprikash that's out of this world. I'll give a heads-up to all… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were. — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
I think comedy has evolved like every art form, and people probably do less standing around and telling jokes, and more things that have… — Adam Carolla Copy Share Image
![“[Giving welfare to poor people] is the equivalent of the government sending [fat people] a jumbo bag of Bugles in the mail twice a month.” quote by Adam Carolla](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/92b/adam-carolla-2058_bags_giving-welfare-to-poor-people-is-the-equ_2434500.jpg)
