Above all others I pity the homeless: where can they go to masturbate? — Robert Clark Copy Share Image
Everyone thinks their whole life should be at least as much fun as masturbation. — Chuck Palahniuk Copy Share Image
When you turn out the light, I've got to hand it to me. Looks like it's you and me again tonight Rosie. — Jackson Browne Copy Share Image
I think the internet is the greatest waste of time since masturbation was discovered. — Norman Mailer Copy Share Image
I even made love to myself once. Uhh, I wasn't suppose to tell you that. — Gary B.B. Coleman Copy Share Image
“Masturbation and meditation both promote physical and mental wellbeing.” — Abhijit Naskar Copy Share Image
Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity, you… — Chuck Palahniuk Copy Share Image
I do not need a man. I am devoted to masturbation. I think it's probably one of the most pleasurable experiences in… — Gloria Stuart Copy Share Image
My friends keep telling me I'm doing it with Mary Palmer. That's not true - I'm too busy masturbating to meet anyone… — Roddy Piper Copy Share Image
Drive the women from the bed just as you drove them from the choir; a eunuch sings in Rome, and the priests… — Franz Grillparzer Copy Share Image
Remember, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm. I really hope no one… — Audrey Hepburn Copy Share Image
“Masturbation is a form of stress relief. So, go fuck yourself and check the bitch at the door next time you visit.” — Lani Lynn Vale Copy Share Image
“The palm of his hand was a dull red. Not a good sign. I jerk off left-handed, he thought, at least that’s… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
Love is what makes sex more than masturbation. If there is no love even if you are really with a partner you… — Slavoj Žižek Copy Share Image
“Masturbation is when you rub your genitals until you have an orgasm. Wow!” — Stephen Chbosky Copy Share Image
Wrap the turkey up in aluminum foil, my brother like to masturbate with baby oil. — Adam Sandler Copy Share Image
A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation. — Karl Kraus Copy Share Image
“Parthenogenesis means never having your mother tell you to stop doing that or you'll go blind.” — Seanan McGuire Copy Share Image
Disco boy, no one understands, but thank the lord you still got hands. — Frank Zappa Copy Share Image
Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of. It's nothing to be particularly proud of, either. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation. — Lily Tomlin Copy Share Image
Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure. — Thomas Szasz Copy Share Image
You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
Methamphetamine is so Flowers for Algernon: All that super-human cerebral ability fades to limited physical activities like stapling carpet scraps to the… — Clint Catalyst Copy Share Image
My first time I jacked off, I thought I'd invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought,… — Chuck Palahniuk Copy Share Image
Call you up in the middle of the night. It's awful hard trying to make love long distance, but I really need… — Billy Joel Copy Share Image
Do you know what 'masturbation' is? I think you probably do because you are older than me. But just in case, I… — Stephen Chbosky Copy Share Image
What was said about him, what the females needed to believe about him, was just oral masturbation for mouths that needed to… — J.R. Ward Copy Share Image
“A writer should be able to open a window or two for others to see the world and themselves in a new… — Barista Uno Copy Share Image
Masturbation is forbidden since he is destroying the potential to create a life. This sin is not punishable by court, only by… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I used to think masturbation was not really sex because it only involved me. That's a very limited view of human sexuality,… — Betty Dodson Copy Share Image
It's masturbation for writers to be able to write this absolutely outrageous personality, in a character that you somehow agree with, part… — Rie Rasmussen Copy Share Image
They are this horrible thing where you are distorted. The chin is too big, the head is too small. No, this is… — Karl Lagerfeld Copy Share Image
shopping for clothes is like masturbation - everyone does it, but it isn't very interesting and therefore should be done alone, in… — Lorrie Moore Copy Share Image
“We would not be ashamed of doing some of the things we do in private, if the number of sane human beings… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Procrastination is like masturbation, in the beginning it feels good, but in the end, you're just f***ing yourself!” — Michael McCarthy Copy Share Image
Every time I talk to a fancy journalist and they ask what I do in my free time my scumbag brain goes… — Anna Kendrick Copy Share Image
I sometimes feel like when you're talking to boys, they just hear certain keywords… But if you had a bubble above their… — Kate Hudson Copy Share Image
