I do whatever comes my way. But I get burned out on stage. It's a lonely world. I think part of the… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
I know my face is turning red. I don't want you to interpret it as being embarrassed. It's rage. The color of… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
I don't want my personal life to change. I don't understand why people strive for fame. I know it's ironic for me… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
I don't really have a pattern yet. I don't know if I'll develop one. As far as comedic integrity, I don't have… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
You know how some people have gay-dar? I have fat-dar. I can automatically tell if you're fat or not. And I also… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
Four years ago on this very day I tried to take my own life. And I said, "Zach, do it in front… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
You know you have a drinking problem when the bartender knows your name -- and you've never been to that bar before. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
If you read my blog, you know I'm a pilates freak. And by pilates, I mean waffles. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
You know it's time to do the laundry when you dry off with a sneaker. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
My girlfriend and I went to a dinner party the other night and we ended up playing charades. There was another couple there that… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
The whole thing about working in front of the camera is to make people laugh when they're not supposed to. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
I kind of put myself out there as is. I'm a quiet person. I don't know if that's surprising. I'm a Pilates junkie. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
It's fun for me to couple emotion with comedy. I think it helps comedy. I think a lot of times American comedies don't play… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
The problem with these interviews is that there's no sarcastic font. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
People are trying to prove things. And I probably have that. I probably do. Probably guilty of it, in a way. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
American society loves to prop people up and then take them down. — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
I just try to keep myself a traditionalist. I liked being an underground comic doing my thing. I want to maintain that. I just… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image