Trans people deserve something vital. They deserve your respect... If you want to call me names, make jokes, doubt my intentions, go… — Bruce Jenner Copy Share Image
I wanted to be funny. And I'm always acknowledged for my pranks and jokes nowadays. — Steve Wozniak Copy Share Image
Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity?" Artemis blinked. "Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I… — Eoin Colfer Copy Share Image
I was feeling guilty in the beginning; it was frustrating to be successful when a lot of my friends weren't. Also, I… — Cindy Sherman Copy Share Image
If I can't face my accusers, that's a joke. We did that in medieval times. — Lance Armstrong Copy Share Image
The art world is the biggest joke going. It's a rest home for the overprivileged, the pretentious, and the weak. And modern… — Banksy Copy Share Image
Everybody jokes about that old story about the world only needing five computers, but when you think about it, that's where we're… — Matt Mullenweg Copy Share Image
Cheers was one of the first shows where I paid attention to the writers because their [work] was better than everything else… — Shawn Ryan Copy Share Image
A lot of comics aren't their on-screen personas; Chris Rock isn't always ranting and raving. What I do is make myself this… — Billy Eichner Copy Share Image
When I played Lady Day, I took Aba onstage with me as a joke. He started singing-in tune!-and the audience loved it. — Eartha Kitt Copy Share Image
I'm kind of a rebound junkie. So. when a relationship goes sour, I look at the sweetness in life elsewhere. So, I… — Vir Das Copy Share Image
Im not saying I hate ya but if u happen to get hit by a bus, I wouldn't say I might not… — Kevin McCarty Copy Share Image
I better start doing stand up comedy in Spanish before every comedian in Mexico translates my jokes. — Felipe Esparza Copy Share Image
One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead… — Jack Handey Copy Share Image
When we can't laugh again and again on the same joke... there's no point crying again and again for the same pain. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Sometimes I want to joke but my English isn't perfect. Sometimes people are wondering what I'm talking about. — Alexander Ovechkin Copy Share Image
What incensed him the most was the blatant jokes of the ones that passed it all off as a jest, pretending to… — James Joyce Copy Share Image
For a comedian to kind of catch onto something right as something's catching on in our culture, a lot of it is… — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
Teacher : How Old are You ? Student : Check the Register .. Teacher : wer r u frm ? Student :… — Reynold Copy Share Image
I was going to start off tonight with an Obama joke, but I don't want to get audited by the IRS. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
