Joke Quotes · Page 44

Humor can bring people under the tent. And a good joke can deflect some of the intensity surrounding a serious subject.

— Ted Danson

I am so happy that I married a comedy writer. He's never not without a joke. No matter where we are.

— Christa Miller

Tell me that I misunderstood a joke, but don't tell me that my choice of cravat is wrong.

— David Niven

I'm pretty equal opportunity when it comes to issues to joke about.

— Elayne Boosler

Whatever is funny is subversive, every joke is ultimately a custard pie... a dirty joke is a sort of mental rebellion.

— George Orwell

I joke that I'm in the market for a cabin in the woods, and, at some point, I won't be joking anymore.

— Kasie Hunt

Be not affronted at a joke. If one throw salt at thee, thou wilt receive no harm, unless thou art raw.

— Oliver Goldsmith

I think Noah Hawley's writing is hilarious, and I love a good dark joke.

— Carrie Coon

I'm a comedian. I want you to laugh. That's my main goal. I punch things up to get things tighter, quicker and…

— Bert Kreischer

I joke that one of the rare times Egyptians identify as African is when the national soccer squad is playing in the…

— Mona Eltahawy

We have a new joke on the reservation: 'What is cultural deprivation?' Answer: 'Being an upper-middle class white kid living in a…

— John Fire Lame Deer

The Nobel Peace Prize has always been a joke - albeit a grim one. Alfred Bernhard Nobel famously invented dynamite and felt…

— P. J. O'Rourke

The term 'steampunk' itself, now a badge of honor, began as a putdown, a joke. But like 'Big Bang' in cosmology, the…

— Paul Di Filippo

My little joke that I make whenever I talk about my show is that the way I sold the show to Netflix…

— Philip Rosenthal

Fashion is kinda a joke. I don't get too bogged down in the clothes. For me, it's one big art project, just…

— Virgil Abloh

I'm a happy guy. I like to joke around. I'm irreverent. I love my family; I love my son. I was very…

— Neymar

Difficulty empathising translates into a whole set of hurdles. You might be last person to get the point of a joke, which…

— Simon Baron-Cohen

“Meanwhile, Milo had been in the Senate on that day until it was dismissed and then came home. He changed out of…

— Cicero

It's funny: when I started playing bass in 1984, you had guys like Paul Simonon fron the Clash, John Paul Jones, Lemmy,…

— Duff McKagan

There's not one thing that inspires me the most. Me and my friends joke around with each other and hang out so…

— Adam DeVine

There's an old joke that politics is Hollywood for ugly people. An awful lot of the press coverage about Washington reads like…

— Ted Cruz

My role is almost a sight-gag. I have to be a woman to sing the lyrics "I am a man" to have…

— Max von Essen

“Don’t give up on your dreams, goals, plans or Ideas because people are laughing at them. People who are narrow minded laugh…

— De philosopher DJ Kyos

When I'm concentrating, I can be fixed in place for hours. In fact, there was a joke in my office that everybody…

— Sonia Sotomayor

The funniest thing in class is when the teacher cracks a joke and no one laughs.

— Enhance Dreams

I mean, this is a joke, to try to implicate me as like a friend of the Russians.

— Jill Stein

My father was always clowning around. It was a huge influence on me. In my family, everything is turned into a joke.

— Ben Miller

Ten comics can say the same joke, and I'm the one who gets called a thief.

— Carlos Mencia

If you think before you speak the other guy gets his joke in first.

— Jimmy Nail

That's just what friends do in general. You have to be able to joke around with each other.

— Nikola Vucevic

“It's all a mere mistake and a worry and a joke—and we'll go home as fast as we can!”

— Henry James

“My old man taught me to never trust anything that bleeds for three days and doesn't die.”

— Tommy Tran

Sorry no one understood you were making an April Fool's joke because no one thinks you have a sense of humor.

— Anonymous

We have this joke in England that half the people want me to be prime minister, and the other half want me…

— Jeremy Kyle

“You know what they say. "One man's joke is another man's brother”

— Neil Leckman

I just do my act. If people in England don't get my joke I make fun of myself for telling it.

— Bill Burr

30 Rock' is probably one of my favorite shows. It's just joke after joke after joke.

— Alison Brie

A caricature is putting the face of a joke on the body of a truth.

— Joseph Conrad

As though all the world were a bad joke and she was the only one around who knew the punchline.

— Jack Ketchum

“Actually, being married to me probably would be something of a joke . . . but yeah, I mean it. What do you think?”

— Danielle Steel