You can't practice stand-up alone in your room. You can't find out if a joke works by asking two of your friends. — Taylor Tomlinson Copy Share Image
“Most unintelligent or foolish people do not regard themselves as that; they regard themselves as not-that-intelligent or not-that-wise.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I'm promoting positivity. I'm promoting happiness and loving yourself and having fun. But it's not a joke. — Lil Yachty Copy Share Image
Any private security is a joke in a country where you're up against your own government. — Bidzina Ivanishvili Copy Share Image
I think the BJP is a joke. It is a party of semi-literates and has fascist tendencies. Such a party can never… — Subramanian Swamy Copy Share Image
I always say, if I tell you a joke right now and it's funny, you laugh. Now, we set the lights, and… — Martin Landau Copy Share Image
“This wise old whiskery fish swims up to three young fish and goes, 'Morning, boys, how's the water?' and swims away; and… — David Foster Wallace Copy Share Image
“...of all the seeds that fly about the world, the one with the most solid wings, enabling it to be scattered at… — Marcel Proust Copy Share Image
I haven't had sex in so long I am considering becoming a born again virgin. — Ryan Swain Copy Share Image
“Puns are just another form of sarcasm, which may or may not make you - smile, giggle, or laugh.” — Aniruddha Sastikar Copy Share Image
'The State' had never done improv. We used to go over scripts for weeks and argue about every joke. But I don't… — Robert Ben Garant Copy Share Image
I get a kick out of replying to people on Twitter sometimes if I make a joke. — Scott Rogowsky Copy Share Image
There aren't plus-sized teens represented in film who aren't made the butt of a joke. — Danielle Macdonald Copy Share Image
The joke I wanted to put into one of the promos for this new season, was to have a guy come up… — Tony Danza Copy Share Image
I haven't had television since 1991, and it definitely influences me. As a child of the 1970s, I couldn't hold a narrative… — Chuck Palahniuk Copy Share Image
Even as a child, I would get film offers, and all my friends would tease me saying, 'You will also be an… — Tiger Shroff Copy Share Image
I want to know why people are getting laughs. Why this joke works and why that one didn't work. It all comes… — Dolph Ziggler Copy Share Image
I remember being in high school and this guy saying to me, 'You'd actually be good-looking if you didn't joke around so… — Melanie Scrofano Copy Share Image
My joke is that three black people watch 'The Daily Show' at any given time. So if I'm watching it, that counts,… — Larry Wilmore Copy Share Image
“My old man taught me to never trust anything that bleeds for three days and doesn't die.” — Tommy Tran Copy Share Image
I just loved jokes so much as a child. I remember wanting to perform at, like... age seven by reading from a… — Josh Gondelman Copy Share Image
