Joke Quotes · Page 38

It's an ongoing joke that a black man is always the first one to get killed in movies.

— J. B. Smoove

when he smiles it's as if you'd just told him the first joke on earth.

— Mitch Albom

Expressing my love to a girl for the first time, and it is being taken as a joke

— Fated To Love

If I made a joke about just dropping by, would you write me off as cliché?

— Cassandra Clare

I was the kid at school who would make the joke about himself before anyone else did.

— Joe Sugg

When they tell you they LOVE YOU dont take it to heart because next line may be hey it was just a…

— Nidhi Saini

Anyone who can't tell the difference between a joke and hate speech is just stupid.

— Jim Norton

There aren't plus-sized teens represented in film who aren't made the butt of a joke.

— Danielle Macdonald

I made so many jokes about poor Russell Crowe, he once knocked on my dressing room door, and told me he wanted…

— Joan Rivers

I make a lot of money. I wear a lot of jewelry. And the reason I buy so much jewelry is to…

— Riff Raff

I'm not big on fat jokes. That's a little beneath me. I'm not a huge fan of making a joke - and…

— Michael Showalter

State of the Culture' is more mature content. We want to go as deep as we can on whatever the subject matter…

— Joe Budden

Talking-head shows are just a camera, a sound guy, and then a PA writing down what you say and a producer asking…

— Nicole Byer

“You know where you can shove your joke. Just get me a new drink and try not to include and of your…

— Kim Harrington

If you can't joke about the most horrendous things in the world, what's the point of jokes? What's the point in having…

— Ricky Gervais

In my mid-20s, I was directing episodes of 'Alfred Hitchcock' and 'Peter Gunn.' I was pretty much on course and - as…

— George Stevens, Jr

“This is a lot more satisfying," he said, "when I have intelligent life whom I can render awed, rapt with attention for…

— Brandon Sanderson

A wise man once sat in the audience and cracked a joke. All laughed like crazy. After a moment, he cracked the…

— Ritu Ghatourey

There were 11 people ten men and one woman hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter. They all decided…

— Mark

I believe fully in making fun of children. I believe very strongly that you should never make fun of an embryo or…

— Kathy Griffin

I started reading about media moguls in general, and Sumner Redstone and Rupert Murdoch both made the same joke: they both were…

— Jesse Armstrong

The audience today has heard every joke. They know every plot. They know where you're going before you even start. That's a…

— Betty White

It seems to me that humour is everybody's way of keeping sane and standing off from the situations so that they can…

— Diana Wynne Jones

I used to pencil in my eyebrows super thick and squarish. I look back at pictures and think, Why didn't anybody tell…

— Ego Nwodim

DAD: Wanna Hear A Joke Son? SON: Yes DAD: Pussy SON: I Don't Get It... DAD: EXACTLY!

— Anonymous

I do things, and other people laugh at them. I rarely know what the joke is supposed to be or why they're…

— Wallace Shawn

That messed up moment when you laugh at a joke that was about you, but you didn't know.

— Anonymous

I'm aware that I should end a joke with the good part, I choose not too.

— Daniel Tosh

I don't really believe in lucky things, but I wear lucky underwear as a joke.

— Julia Mancuso

I always joke with people that having nephews is the best birth control there is.

— Tahj Mowry

“What in the world is this abomination?” Lissa, only slightly more tactful, asked, “Adrian, is this some kind of joke?”

— Richelle Mead

“I blinked at that, confused. I’m not supposed to be the guy who doesn’t get the reference joke, dammit.”

— Jim Butcher

“Let us live while we can, speak while we may, and at present pursue our journey; for, this joke has already lasted…

— Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

“It was a joke to the extent in the context of the views that speech.”

— Herman Cain

My family joke that I'm really a very senior person who accidentally happens to be 11.

— Adora Svitak

I'll say things that are serious and put them in a joke form so people can enjoy them. We laugh to keep…

— Kanye West

When you tell an Iowan a joke, you can see a kind of race going on between his brain and his expression.

— Bill Bryson

I've never pitched a joke that I wouldn't be comfortable seeing in a Pixar film.

— Alex Hirsch

That's the joke about confinement pigs: they taste like whatever sauce you cook them with.

— Joel Salatin

Humor is a huge part of the way I operate; if people can't understand a joke then they should not follow me.

— Shibani Dandekar