“Shit!"Holly said when our eyes fell on her bra lying at our feet. I snatched it from the ground, trying to stuff… — Julie Cross Copy Share Image
“I remembered that Beethoven's symphonies had sometimes been given names... they should have call [the Fifth] the Vampire, because it simply refused… — Alan Bradley Copy Share Image
The old water heater in my dressing room was working, but it was kind of tired. It gave off about as much… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Relationship humour gets the most laughs. If I'm able to get the women laughing, men will have to laugh along because they… — Vir Das Copy Share Image
“[An example of misattribution:] If you don’t know the source of a quote, you can always make it sound better by attributing… — Jakub Marian Copy Share Image
“This may interest you. A letter from my dear cousin Fouquier-Tinville.” Camille cast an eye over his relative’s best handwriting. “Squirm, flattery,… — Hilary Mantel Copy Share Image
“Joe Spork opens the door. The man departs. Joe turns to Polly to say something about how they’re obviously not going to… — Nick Harkaway Copy Share Image
“I’ve had affairs before but never like this - I need a reason to leave my wife,” Shimansky said, desperately appealing to… — Chassis Albuquerque Copy Share Image
“Of course I began to see Nikki, which was strange because I was staring into Danny's eyes, and Danny is a six-foot-three… — Matthew Quick Copy Share Image
“He, Cromwell, says to his visitors, just tell them this, and tell them loud: to each monk, one bed: to each bed,… — Hilary Mantel Copy Share Image
“Bildon killed Tad. Look, there’s his dagger hidden in the pot of semolina. There’s the proof,” he screamed. “It’s in the pudding.”… — Ken Magee Copy Share Image
“I'm a whore!" Miki hit the brakes...her hands.. gripping the steering wheel, glanced at Sara. "You're not wearing any underwear, are you?"… — Shelly Laurenston Copy Share Image
“Yves. You are goint to love him all over again when you meet him, believe me. You're married.' 'I'm what? But I… — Joss Stirling Copy Share Image
“Playing an instrument is its own reward. Cleaning out a spit valve is its own punishment.” — Peter James West Copy Share Image
People think that I can just walk into a room and get a job, but of the 200 interviews and auditions I… — Oona Chaplin Copy Share Image
I spent more time in America, but I developed a very English sense of humour. I clicked into it deeply with Peter… — Christopher Guest Copy Share Image
“And remember, Wallis, there's something the matter with Mr. Allan's shutters. They won't always close the sunshine out as they should." Wallis… — Margaret Widdemer Copy Share Image
“Logan licked a glob of strawberry jelly from her lower lip and smiled up at Odin. Only one comment seemed to perfectly… — Jennifer Turner Copy Share Image
“Now you here and dealing not with him, who is dead, but with me, who is sitting here.” “But,” he said in… — David Adams Richards Copy Share Image
“It's amazing the stupid things I say sometimes. I mean, you could start an entire branch of scientific research about the stuff… — Tad Williams Copy Share Image
“Casting my own eye down Fifth Avenue as my belly swelled, I would register with incredulity: Every one of these people came… — Lionel Shriver Copy Share Image
“Think you've got the guts to actually go through with it this time?" (Puck) I responded by slashing at his face, barely… — Julie Kagawa Copy Share Image
“Lord Carradice managed to look wicked, smug, and saintly, all at the same time.” — Anne Gracie Copy Share Image
In terms of love, you're not in control and I hate that feeling. I seem to write a lot of sad songs… — Freddie Mercury Copy Share Image
People come up to me in supermarkets and demand humour. And the less amusing I am, the more they piss themselves. So… — Steve Coogan Copy Share Image
“My dad used to tell me that laughter was like a cough or a sneeze - the body's way of trying to… — J. Ross Clara Copy Share Image
“Much has been written on the excellence of bats' navigation equipment. It is all false. Tropical bats spend their entire time flying… — Nigel Barley Copy Share Image
“I was making for that city in the south of which it was said in our village: "There you'll find queer folk!… — Franz Kafka Copy Share Image
Dogs yell by Barking; Yelling to a barking dog is actually barking back. — Jaison Ndlovu Copy Share Image
“Is this what you do with your spare time?” he asked me, ignoring his sister. “What—are you deciding to talk to me… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“Would you like some sacred chocolate?' a girl asked, appearing suddenly at Lara's side. 'They've very special chocolates,' she said, pushing a… — Lola Salt Copy Share Image
“...and - holy shit was this song bad. It was like the singer was stabbing my ear with a dagger made of… — David Wong Copy Share Image
You can decide to invade Russia at dinner, pick Waterloo for battle on a whim. It's the details, the small stuff. Its… — Dwight D. Eisenhower Copy Share Image
“Mrs. Trotter made a sincere though wrong sound, while opening her handbag to look for help.” — Patrick White Copy Share Image
“He’s my cat! He’s not God’s cat! Let God have his own cat! Let God have all the damn old cats He… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“And very amusing it is to watch,” said Jem. “Did you know you twitch your nose when you sleep, like a rabbit?”… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image