“All I could determine was that it must have been a nice thing to see if it was a house you were… — Morgan Matson Copy Share Image
The vision is really that in the information age the microprocessor-based machine, the PC, along with great software, can become sort of… — Bill Gates Copy Share Image
I called the restaurant and I asked them if they take orders, when they said they do, I told them 'run outside… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I was in improv workshops or doing stand-up or writing comedy with others, or just doing comedy, I just laughed. Funny… — Michael Keaton Copy Share Image
ChildHoodMemory when ya mom snap on over something u can't control...lol...I member one time she told us to be quiet & I… — IG:catone_2_funny Copy Share Image
I guess one that wouldn't be obvious is - well, maybe it's super obvious, I can't tell - 'I Love Lucy' is… — Kate Micucci Copy Share Image
Everyone is born with a sense of curiosity, some with an overload of curiosity than others... Remember that one time in the… — Epifania Savea Copy Share Image
We knew the front door was always left open, but we broke in just to keep in practice. Doxy turned all the… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
When I was a kid I always imagined myself waking up to & sleeping to a social networking website. Dreams do come true. — Green Monk Copy Share Image
It's part of the gift and the curse of coming behind my brother. I'm not afforded the luxury of just taking a… — Tony Rock Copy Share Image
When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when you… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
That's what's interesting about people. It can be funny, but when [John] Travolta got there and did [comic moments] you're like, "Oh!… — Ti West Copy Share Image
I've been to many funerals of funny people, and they're some of the funniest days you'll ever have, because the emotions run… — Albert Brooks Copy Share Image
Nobody fights with Jerry because you know the price would be too high. You might come out the winner, at his age,… — Frank Layden Copy Share Image
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Eighty is when you order a steak and the headwaiter puts it through the blender. Or when you wake up as many… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
He's funny. He's adorable. He's sweet, loving. He's awesome. He's perfect. I didn't say a name but he popped into your head,… — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
I happen to be very good with younger actors because I have extremely vivid memories of that time of my life, and… — David M. Evans Copy Share Image
You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds'… — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
If a comedian tells a joke that you find funny, you laugh. If he tells a joke you do not find funny,… — Gilbert Gottfried Copy Share Image
Actually, it only takes one drink to get me loaded. Trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or fourteenth. — George Burns Copy Share Image
You cant be a casual observer of something humorous - you have to engage, you have to find it funny for the… — Brendan Coyle Copy Share Image
Alien Chutney is just what the name suggests it is. Its music that is so funny and quirky and weird that it… — Vir Das Copy Share Image
The difference between Pleasure and Torture…Pleasure is thinking of you and Torture is thinking of you too much! — Simi Ngr Copy Share Image
“I don’t know. You’ll have to ask him yourself.” She sat up enough to look him in the eye. “I am not… — G.A. Aiken Copy Share Image
“I'm realizing that some of my greatest (or at least most determined) genius lies in my ability to procrastinate.” — Scott Stabile Copy Share Image
There's only one rule in stand-up, which is that you have to be funny. Yet 99 per cent of comics look and… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
So my mum bought a jacuzzi, and I was in there along with my father and my sister, when my mother decided… — Russell Howard Copy Share Image
In twenty years from now... when we look back at all the stupid shit we did, it can be from behind a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“You're walking funny," Lucy said, a shit-eating grin on her face. Five days of out of this world sex with a starving… — Nalini Singh Copy Share Image
Trousers can never be too tight. You have to go through a couple of days of pain, then everything stretches out. — Noel Fielding Copy Share Image
When your parents don't answer your calls, it's ok but when you don't answer your parent's calls, worldwar III is about to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's funny: I feel like so many people say, 'Monogamy, it's not natural; we created that for a variety of reasons,' but… — Rosemarie DeWitt Copy Share Image
I ain't sayin she's a gold digger, but she ain't messing with no broke white guy who's afraid to finish the rest… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You can almost liken 'Bad Samaritan' to 'Funny Games' because it's that theme of horror just down the street in your neighborhood. — Robert Sheehan Copy Share Image
It became sort of a snowball effect, with guys trying to deal in their own way with 9/11, whether it was drinking… — Denis Leary Copy Share Image
Here is the piece. If you can't say fornicate can you say copulate or if not that can you say co-habit? If… — Ernest Hemingway Copy Share Image
Urgent necessity prompts many to do things, at the very thoughts of which they perhaps would start at other times. — Miguel de Cervantes Copy Share Image
People always tell me, 'You should do drama. You should do drama.' Even when I first got an agent, they were like,… — Tiffany Haddish Copy Share Image
In Africa, we were around thousands of people who have seen a lot of poverty, but they were fun at the end… — Angelina Jolie Copy Share Image
![“That's what's interesting about people. It can be funny, but when [John] Travolta got there and did [comic moments] you're like, "Oh! This is really funny." Or when Karen [Gillan] and Taissa [Farmiga] do something, I'm like, "This came out so much funnier."” quote by Ti West](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/426/ti-west-2310_comic_that-s-what-s-interesting-about-people-i_277612.jpg)
