Comedy Quotes · Page 172

Breathe in a smile; breathe out a chuckle. (You can do it.)

— Cheri Huber

I like my jokes to be built on a foundation of ideas, or at least smart observations.

— George Carlin

HOMŒOPATHIST, n. The humorist of the medical profession.

— Ambrose Bierce

Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

— George Carlin

Just because something makes you smile or laugh ... doesn't mean it's a joke.

— David Rees

I tried and failed at doing stand-up on my own in 2002 but I hadn't found my voice.

— Tim Key

Laugh a lot. A good sense of humor cures almost all of life's ills.

— Ritu Ghatourey

He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.

— Henny Youngman

Comedy is good at analysing and dealing with evil because it doesn't present it as evil but a collection of banalities.

— David Farr

“[T]he definition of 'crazy' in show business is a woman who keeps talking even after no one wants to fuck her anymore.”

— Tina Fey

If I were running a campaign, I'd urge taking the mountain of money reportedly squandered on pizza, coffee and bagels and spending…

— Dick Cavett

I don't love comedy but I can watch someone who's kind of interesting forever. I think a waitress who's having a bad…

— Bruce McCulloch

I have issues with food and weight and I can make that funny. The audience loves it. I have fun with it.

— John Pinette

I really love having conversations and deconstructing things. I don't mind not having a laugh every second. Sometimes things deserve a little…

— Larry Wilmore

I'm trying to, with my stand-up and with the podcast, give people these little stupid things to give them happiness. I know…

— Pete Holmes

Comedy's easy for me now - it's all about timing and the way you deliver lines. I use facial expressions to get…

— Melissa Joan Hart

'Cloud 9' is an action/romantic comedy that focuses on the competitive world of snowboarding. We have glamorised it to so that all…

— Dove Cameron

I've seen shows where comedians cracked about someone not clapping, then realized they've only got one hand, or joked about someone wearing…

— Nate Bargatze

One of the attractions of translating 'Heroes' is that it's not the kind of play that I write. If it had been,…

— Tom Stoppard

When you're 17 years old, you have no idea who you are as a person, so there's no way you can be…

— Dana Gould

I love straight-face comedy or relatively subtle comedy. And then I turn around and I find myself doing very broad comedy but…

— Betty White

Is everything funny? For me, yes. There's a positive to every negative. Even my divorce? For me, yes. If you go back…

— Kevin Hart

When you wrap up your self-worth with your talent, and suddenly you might not be the most talented, that's really scary. And…

— Rachel Bloom

“Next door but one is Quinlan Broddle, a Viceroy with a fear of gardens. So much so that he sold his garden…

— St. John Morris

Let's face it, comedy's a dead art form. Tragedy, now that's funny.

— Bender (The Cartoon Character

Stereotypically speaking feminists can't take a joke. ::audience boo:: See?

— Louis C. K

I have a sick sense of humor. Like, I'm always laughing at my own pain.

— Tierra Whack

We can't laugh again again on the same joke,then Y do we cry again again for the same problem pain

— Babloo

I've been doing a lot of drama, but I feel like comedy is my strength.

— Taraji P. Henson

I'm still proud of a lot of my jokes when I started.

— Amy Schumer

Jokes? There are no jokes. The truth is the funniest joke of all.

— Muhammad Ali

The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing at you.

— Phyllis Diller

It's kind of hard coming from 'Saturday Night Live,' which is a sketch-driven show, to a movie.

— Bob Newhart

I hadn't really done a comedy other than The Ape since Freaks and Geeks.

— Seth Rogen

If my jokes offend you: 1. Im sorry. 2. It wont happen again. 3. 1 & 2 are lies. and 4. get over it.

— Anonymous

“Misery can hold back happiness but Laughter can outlast any Tragedy”

— Sonny Cele

I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny

— Jerry Stiller

We should tackle reality in a slightly jokey way, otherwise we miss its point.

— Lawrence Durrell

A lot of people don't think of my work as being all that funny, but I think it's hilarious!

— Fred Tomaselli

Stand-up has the best writers, because it's the hardest writing by a million miles.

— Norm MacDonald