I was scared of running off to be a comedian and then having to come back with my tail between my legs. — Paddy McGuinness Copy Share Image
Everyone, everywhere, and all the time, used to laugh at me when I was growing up. So, when I was around 18,… — Emo Philips Copy Share Image
People have been telling me I'm a failure and that I'm doing it all wrong for 20 years now. Never trust anybody… — Kevin Smith Copy Share Image
I wasn't even a big comedy nerd. A lot of the comedians I know - a lot of my friends are comedians… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
When you're a cricket fan, your summer is defined by the Test match itinerary. Similarly, when you're a young comedian, your summer… — Tim Key Copy Share Image
I think comedians have a function in society, which is to make fun of our icons. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
One of the problems I see with these comics on television, particularly cable television, is, since you can say anything in terms… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
If a comedian tells a joke that you find funny, you laugh. If he tells a joke you do not find funny,… — Gilbert Gottfried Copy Share Image
The one thing that's depressing as a comedian to realize is that rock stars get groupies, and comedians don't. — Matt Besser Copy Share Image
Canadian comedians are generally more well-rounded... They have to do a lot more. In order to have a career in this country,… — Scott Thompson Copy Share Image
As a comedian, I am attracted to truths that are uncomfortable. I like funny bummers. — Adam Conover Copy Share Image
Over the years, I've realized that I have as much in common with the performance artist, the standup comedian, the screenwriter, as… — Rob Bell Copy Share Image
There are many terms that have been used to describe me: man, comedian, disappointment, hammock enthusiast. — Joe Lycett Copy Share Image
Two cannibals were eating a comedian, and one of them turns to the other and asks, 'Does this taste funny to you? — Nicholas Sparks Copy Share Image
I am a product... I'm a comedian. I'm not curing cancer. In the end, I tell jokes. I make people laugh. — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
I always wanted to give people the more exciting version of what I think a comedian should be - because I didn't… — Andrew Dice Clay Copy Share Image
I thought I better warn you that I am not one of those politically correct comedians, but it turns out that also… — Robin Ince Copy Share Image
Jewish comedians do the best Jewish jokes, and anyone else doing that, they don't have a right to, because they're not coming… — Simon Pegg Copy Share Image
Though part of me had always wanted to be a comedian, another part of me had always wanted to be Bryant Gumbel… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It doesn't bother me that I'm not a household word on the East Coast. Baton Rouge, Raleigh, Minneapolis - I'm so popular… — Elayne Boosler Copy Share Image
