I saw a startling sight today, a politician with his hands in his own pockets. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people, but if we tried to shut up the insane we… — Mark Twain Asylums Copy Share Image
A reputable lawyer will advise you to keep out of the law, make the best of a foolish bargain, and not get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous. — Mark Twain Comedy Copy Share Image
It is our nature to conform; it is a force which not many can successfully resist. What is its seat? The inborn… — Mark Twain Approval Copy Share Image
My books are like water; those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water. — Mark Twain Books Copy Share Image
…try the mustard, - a man can't know what turnips are in perfection without mustard. — Mark Twain Food Copy Share Image
What is the real function, the essential function, the supreme function, of language? Isn't it merely to convey ideas and emotions? Certainly.… — Mark Twain Brevity Copy Share Image
“Why, an' thou shouldst live a thousand years thou'dst never hear so masterful a cursing. Alack, her art died with her. There… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“I once heard a grouty northern invalid say that a coconut tree might be poetical, possibly it was; but it looked like… — Mark Twain Hawaii Copy Share Image
The signs of excessive indulgence in this destructive pastime are easily detectable. They are these: A disposition to eat, to drink, to… — Mark Twain Desire Copy Share Image
“It is my prayer, it is my longing, that we may pass from this life together—a longing which shall never perish from… — Mark Twain End of time Copy Share Image
Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer… — Mark Twain Alcohol Copy Share Image
The time to begin writing an article is when you have finished it to your satisfaction. By that time you begin to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is only one expert who is qualified to examine the souls and the life of a people and make a valuable… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill came always together, who would escape hanging? — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. — Mark Twain Communication Copy Share Image
Look at you in war...There has never been a just one, never an honorable one, on the part of the instigator of… — Mark Twain Anti war Copy Share Image
India has two million gods, and worships them all. In religion all other countries are paupers; India is the only millionaire. — Mark Twain Country Copy Share Image
Perseverance is a principle that should be commendable in those who have judgment to govern it — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Our heroes are men who do things which we recognize, with regret, and sometimes with a secret shame, that we cannot do. — Mark Twain Hero Copy Share Image
The banging and slamming and booming and crashing were something beyond belief. [On Lohengrin] — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. — Mark Twain Death Copy Share Image
“To be good is noble. To tell other people how to be good is even nobler and much less trouble” — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
You perceive I generalize with intrepidity from single instances. It is the tourist's custom. — Mark Twain Customs Copy Share Image
It is easier to manufacture seven facts out of whole cloth than one emotion. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
New Year's Day - Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving… — Mark Twain Christmas Copy Share Image
What, sir, would the people of the earth be without woman? They would be scarce, sir, almighty scarce. — Mark Twain Almighty Copy Share Image
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else. This is not advice, it is merely custom. — Mark Twain Advice Copy Share Image
What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his… — Mark Twain Life Copy Share Image
I hope all of us may eventually be together in everlasting peace and bliss -- except the inventor of the # telephone . — Mark Twain Bliss Copy Share Image
Well enough for old folks to rise early, because they have done so many mean things all their lives they can't sleep… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I was dead for millions of years before I was born and it never inconvenienced me a bit. — Mark Twain Atheism Copy Share Image
A man who keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificant by and by. — Mark Twain Business Copy Share Image
“I've experienced a great deal of pain and suffering in my life … most of which has never happened.” — Mark Twain Pain Copy Share Image
The human being places sexual intercourse above all other joys, but leaves it out of his heaven. — Mark Twain Happiness Copy Share Image
I prefer milk because I am a Prohibitionist, but I do not go to it for inspiration. — Mark Twain Cooking Copy Share Image
![“The banging and slamming and booming and crashing were something beyond belief. [On Lohengrin]” quote by Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/e36/mark-twain-22_banging_the-banging-and-slamming-and-booming-and_1676592.png)
