“Saint Lassie smiles upon me! It's Coyote, with a bag of goodies.” — Kevin Hearne Animal Copy Share Image
On a Creep Scale from Hello Kitty to Cthulhu, I award it a Freddy Krueger. Granuaile MacTiernan — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
Bullshit, as you Americans say. He's Irish. The Irish say bullshit too. — Kevin Hearne Bullshit Copy Share Image
“Cowardly? Bleh. Tell you what: Let’s debate the meaning of honor and see who lives longer. The” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Oberon perked up, "Awesome! I've never seen a base model elf before! But they come with bonus dudes?” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
Depression is a prison to which you have the key except you never think to look for it. — Kevin Hearne Crime Copy Share Image
“If Jeff wished to pursue the matter he'd have to leave his beer, and I felt intuitively that he would never do… — Kevin Hearne Humor Copy Share Image
My mouth gaped and I think I might have whimpered. The Norns had obliterated him completely—a creature they’d known for centuries—because of… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
They never predict anything fun," Granuaile answered. "Just once I'd like to hear a prophet tell someone, 'Thou shalt win a bitchin'… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“I don’t have enough information to make a rational decision. It’s like you’re asking me to order a drink according to how… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Celibacy is a terrible idea, adhered to by people who hate themselves and want everyone else to do the same. You should… — Kevin Hearne Celibacy Copy Share Image
“...Brain death didn't allow one time to heal, and the brain was the warehouse for the spirit. Punch a hole in that… — Kevin Hearne Death Copy Share Image
She thinks petting me is an honor. This is an unexpected position to take for a goddess of slaughter, but I applaud… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
He was a god of rock. He nearly solved all the world's problems with nothing but power chords and anguished cries into… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
You will respect my authori-tah!' Oberon said, in a passable imitation of Eric Cartman. I reminded him that I needed to concentrate.… — Kevin Hearne Dog Copy Share Image
Here is how you know someone has had a good idea: Other people freely admit to their friends that said idea has… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“What sealed the deal for me was that the cloak wouldn't come off without a generous donation of my tears. Those used… — Kevin Hearne Dreams Copy Share Image
Icy glares from vampires are far icier than icy glares from people and when the vampire giving you an icy glare is… — Kevin Hearne Body Copy Share Image
“What Sherlock does is train his mind to remember details, access them as needed, and then spy the hidden pattern in them.… — Kevin Hearne Psychology Copy Share Image
“I quietly cast camouflage on myself, which is the nearest I can come to invisibility. It binds my pigment to my surroundings,… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Did you get me that movie about Genghis Khan? 'It's in the Netflix queue, but that's not the surprise. You don't need… — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“there’s no damsel with a tragic history in there? With a name like the Three Craftsmen, they each should build something awesome… — Kevin Hearne History Copy Share Image
Flidais clapped her hands in delight. "Oh, I bet he nearly shat kine!" That made me laugh - I hadn't heard that… — Kevin Hearne Clans Copy Share Image
“They may have been victims at one time, but what you have to focus on is what they are now.” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Their numbers swell like viruses until they madden someone with a large army.” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“Jesus "...It sounds like these guys would be filed under Assholes Who do Evil Shit in My Name.” — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
“I do beg your pardon. Let's literally throw up, but figuratively throw down.” — Kevin Hearne Forgiveness Copy Share Image
If I waved that in front of a museum curator, he'd promptly lose control of his salivary glands. — Kevin Hearne Copy Share Image
Anyone who's ever tried to tangle with a teddy bear cholla knows there's a whole lot more bear than teddy to it. — Kevin Hearne Bears Copy Share Image
