“Most poor people do not really aspire to end poverty; they merely aspire to escape it.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Some people ate less food less often when they each had a home than they now do as hobos.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it.” — Dorothy Parker Copy Share Image
“Crunches are an exercise where you lie on your back and angrily try to head-butt your crotch.” — Matthew Inman Copy Share Image
“What could she have done? She was a heroine, and with that came certain obligations.” — Emily C.A. Snyder Copy Share Image
“Evil influence is like a nicotine patch, you cannot help but absorb what sticks to you.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Sometimes he was weird, sometimes he was Captain Douchebag, but he was always my best friend.” — Sharon Sant Copy Share Image
But I think our humour is exactly the same today. Only, we've made rules now. We've said we are not going to… — Jennifer Saunders Copy Share Image
“I was glad to be made aware that “Veimke” (jeune fille au pair), is subject to natural law, and can be made… — Roman Payne Copy Share Image
Comedy comes from childhood only. The humour genes you are born with remain with you. I was always making mischief and making… — Johnny Lever Copy Share Image
Humour is the making others act or talk absurdly and unconsciously; wit is the pointing out and ridiculing that absurdity consciously, and… — William Hazlitt Copy Share Image
“Some people will insult your intelligence by suddenly being nice or nicer to you once you make it … or they think… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
A male scorpion is stabbed to death after mating. In chess, the powerful queen often does the same to the king without… — Gregor Piatigorsky Copy Share Image
“As a comedian, the more you commit the sin of stupidity, three essential things happen to your life: ~people applaud you incessantly.… — Michael Bassey Johnson Copy Share Image
There was a young fellow from Trinity, Who took the square root of infinity. But the number of digits, Gave him the… — George Gamow Copy Share Image
I am a neat hand at cookery, and I'll tell you what I knocked up for my Christmas-eve dinner in the Library… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
“All I really, really want to do is find a very, very fine chocolate store that I can walk into and then… — C. JoyBell C Copy Share Image
“I was making for that city in the south of which it was said in our village: "There you'll find queer folk!… — Franz Kafka Copy Share Image
“Because you were wearing a badge, customers assumed you were an oracle. 'What aisle is the desiccated coconut' 'How long do you… — Alan Carr Copy Share Image
“Spring had come finally and after much hesitation, to Lincoln's Inn Fields and there were daffodils out upon the green grass and… — D.J. Taylor Copy Share Image
When you're working on a scene, both in the script phase and also in the moment, you look around and you wait… — Alex Kurtzman Copy Share Image
“The division seems rather unfair," I remarked. "You have done all the work in this business. I get a wife out of… — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
“and it was surely the case also that only machines built to so large a scale and of such pristine alloys could… — Mike McCormack Copy Share Image
“I am the sum of my past experience. Some people have got a lot to answer for.” — Peter James West Copy Share Image
“ Status: Naked. On bed. With boy. Systems overheating. Sudden doubts multiplying. Meltdown imminent. ” — J.C. Lillis Copy Share Image
“Adults who use big words in order to seem intelligent are annoying, especially those who are not intelligent.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
... what such people miscall their religion, is a vent for their bad humours and arrogance. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Nonsense, this is my home and I must defend it. It’s time for Santa to get serious.” — Michael Diack Copy Share Image
“You are not the first, and will not be the last, to say so. I wear my “warped” label with pride.” — Jessica Park Copy Share Image
A WISE MAN washes his hand after he PEES. But, A WISER MAN Doesn't PEE On his hand ... — Pacifiersucker Copy Share Image
“Supermarkets were introduced into Britain to destroy small businesses and create a sense of social alienation” — Little Britain Copy Share Image
“I often don't know where my Luggage is, that's what being a tourist is all about," said Twoflower.” — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“You’re so damn big,” she whispered. “Why, thank you cariño,” he said.” — Cherise Sinclair Copy Share Image
The writing is a joy, so seamless you nearly miss the sheer artistry of the style and the terrific, wry humour. — Ken Bruen Copy Share Image
“Norns are incredible architects. They simply use death as a building block.” Andacellus, Viddion marah.” — Taylor Grace Copy Share Image
