“It is a mistake," Labruyère tells us, "to be in love without an ample fortune.” — Marcel Proust Copy Share Image
A wise man once told me, no matter how HOT she is, somebody somewhere is sick of her. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Be generous with your smile and try not to frown. And you will see my children; your smile will never let you… — Benny Bellamacina Copy Share Image
“Throughout life try to remember...to always keep your head up high and your middle finger higher!” — Timothy Pina Copy Share Image
“One thing I have to give Christians; were it not for Sunday, every day of the week would be a workday.” — Lex Allen Copy Share Image
Give a small boy a hammer and he will find that everything he encounters needs pounding. — Abraham Kaplan Copy Share Image
I consider myself a bit of a comedian. I write a lot of humorous songs. — Brad Paisley Copy Share Image
“Pissing out the window, and sh*tting out the window, are two different things!” — Tourettes Guy Copy Share Image
In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sometimes, I think the best kind of poem is one in which there is an acute balance between what is humorous and… — N. Scott Momaday Copy Share Image
I thought I was going to be known for my humor. But then I had an idea for a story, which was… — Jay Asher Copy Share Image
Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
“What sort of funny songs?" "My balls are swearing my balls are swearing I can't keep my balls from sweating ohhh no."… — Anna carey Copy Share Image
“Death, taxes and childbirth! There's never any convenient time for any of them. ― Margaret Mitchell, Gone with the Wind” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
He had that rare weird electricity about him - that extremely wild and heavy presence that you only see in a person… — Hunter S. Thompson Copy Share Image
We need time to relax and enjoy ourselves too, no matter how dark the story. The occasional humorous moment helps with that.… — Patrick Rothfuss Copy Share Image
Here was my first lesson on the resolutely maintained untidiness and ill-health of the English upper orders. In baggy evening dress and… — Clive James Copy Share Image
“Jane: "Look, Dave Chandler left me on the ninth floor of our university research library without my panties after we lost our… — Molly Harper Copy Share Image
Living, as I do, in an educated and scientific atmosphere, I could not have conceived that the first principles of zoology were… — Arthur Conan Doyle Copy Share Image
“I poke at my skull with a finger. It didn't feel soft or anything. I didn't feel insane. But if you'd really… — Jim Butcher Copy Share Image
“It's all your fault, Mother,' said Larry austerely; 'you shouldn't have brought us up to be so selfish.' 'I like that!' exclaimed… — Gerald Durrell Copy Share Image
Vell," said Mr. Weller, "Now I s'pose he'll want to call some witnesses to speak to his character, or p'raps to prove… — Charles Dickens Copy Share Image
Well, I would - if they realized that we - again if - if we led them back to that stalemate only… — Ronald Reagan Copy Share Image
“I turned on the television and watched a movie about a girl who’d fallen in love with both a vampire and a… — Kristen Middleton Copy Share Image
“I can't get her pregnant! I'm just thirteen. You have to be a man to get a girl pregnant.” — Scylar Tyberius Copy Share Image
John Connally's conversion to the GOP raised the intellectual level of both parties. — Frank Mankiewicz Copy Share Image
“Worry wasn’t an emotion to which he was particularly accustomed—and it worried him.” — Sol Luckman Copy Share Image
If I could out run the Angel of Death I'd probably die from lack of breath! — Stanley Victor Paskavich Copy Share Image
I'd rather have 1% of the effort of 100 men than 100% of my own effort. — J. Paul Getty Copy Share Image
I don't answer the phone. I get the feeling whenever I do that there will be someone on the other end. — Fred Couples Copy Share Image
“ELVIS & MARILYN: The deader they get - the more money they make.” — Chocolate Waters Copy Share Image
He who attacks the fundamentals of the American broadcasting industry attacks democracy itself. — William S. Paley Copy Share Image
“It was possible that he was making some progress in his mental health condition by seeing me.” — Holly Goldberg Sloan Copy Share Image
“Damn there were days being a woman confused the hell out of her.- Aella” — Eve Langlais Copy Share Image
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. — Oscar Wilde Copy Share Image
He has denied what has happened. His sworn statements have denied what has happened. — Patricia Schroeder Copy Share Image
“I have a constant hungry bum. It's like my own venus fly trap” — Monica Merrill Mylet Copy Share Image
