Comedian Quotes · Page 35

There are many comedians who are afraid to work outside the coasts and the casinos because they're afraid they'll bomb.

— Elayne Boosler

Jesus was a brilliant Jewish stand-up comedian, a phenomenal improviser. His parables are great one-liners.

— Camille Paglia

Ask any physical comedian and they'll say the same thing. There are so many dark moments in comedy.

— Lee Evans

Once or twice I've been described as a light comedian. I consider this the most accurate description of my abilities I've ever…

— Bing Crosby

To me, seeing a really great comedian is a bit like watching a musician or a poet.

— Dick Gregory

As a comedian, I am attracted to truths that are uncomfortable. I like funny bummers.

— Adam Conover

If all you had to be was a comedian to be a good football player. Bob Hope would be great. But you…

— Cris Collinsworth

Even if I wasn't an actress or a comedian, I would be spreading love and laughter [with] whatever I did.

— Kim Coles

Dave Chappelle is about as gifted as it gets, as a performer and comedian. [...] It's always great to watch him work.…

— Ted Alexandro

I was a sheet metal worker, then a metal engineer, then a Pontin's bluecoat, then a comedian. You can achieve anything you…

— Bradley Walsh

Reggie Watts is a most unusual talent: a huge vocal range, a natural musicality, and a sidesplitting wit. Is he a comedian?…

— Brian Eno

Chevy Chase and Bill Murray - we thought those guys were funny. We love Bill Murray, but we didn't think they were…

— David Zucker

I'm a comedian, and I definitely see the humor in a lot of things. I am also sad a lot. I cry…

— Ellen DeGeneres

While painting I noticed a piece of madras cloth on the floor. As usual, my mind started working overtime and a pair…

— St. Lucia

As well as being a comedian, I am - whether I like it or not - representative of another group of people,…

— Chris McCausland

So I watched the Pink Panther last night, and so I'm trying desperately to be funny, and then it's just not working…

— Dave Matthews

Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional…

— Chris Rock

The greatest comedian I've ever seen is Jack Benny. He wasn't afraid of the silences.

— Bob Newhart

Being a comedian is probably the only job apart from undertaking that isn't age restricted.

— Peter Kay

We live in a fun time with so many ways to express yourself, you would be crazy to be a comedian and…

— Sarah Silverman

I'm friends with a lot of comedians, but we don't talk about material. Most comedians I know don't watch a lot of…

— Bo Burnham

A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.

— Fred Allen

There really is no Johnny Carson anymore. There is no one place a comedian can appear and explode.

— Tom Leykis

“I'm lucky I'm a comedian, 'cause otherwise my life would just be a series of undocumented low points.”

— Kyle Kinane

Because you make me laugh don't make you a comic. A comedian is a person who, that's how they make their living.

— Dick Gregory

All of my life doing interviews, comedy has been my favorite thing, comedians are my favorite people.

— Larry King

I can't be typecast as a comedian. Only an actor capable of doing three-dimensional roles can do comedy.

— Rajpal Yadav

Too much comedy today is vulgar, not clever. I say that as a comedian and as a consumer.

— Mort Sahl

In a more intellectually rigorous age, I wouldn't be talked about as a satirist at all. I would just be a topical…

— Rory Bremner

I put a new engine in my car, but forgot to take the old one out. Now my car goes 500 miles…

— Anonymous

I wanted to be a comedian, and this is what I'm doing. If I can keep this going, I'm happy.

— Gabriel Iglesias

What keeps me going is that this I all there is. I am a comedian, and this is what I do. It's…

— Iliza Shlesinger

There's a comedian, Paul Reiser, very funny. I remember reading his book when I first started comedy and I remember laughing like…

— Nate Bargatze

I went to L.A. to become an actress, and I started from the ground up. I worked as an extra, and then…

— Anjelah Johnson

Racial humor was about 35% of my act when I first started. But I realized that it was a crutch. What brought…

— Bill Cosby

I was a guest on Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee with Jerry Seinfeld, and I interviewed him when I was 15 years…

— Judd Apatow

I went to college as an economics major because that was the easiest major that could still please your Asian parents, and…

— Jimmy O. Yang

People have been telling me I'm a failure and that I'm doing it all wrong for 20 years now. Never trust anybody…

— Kevin Smith

Christians have always been fodder for comedians who have tended to portray them as anoraks - slightly clammy, beatifically smiley dullards with…

— Jo Brand

I do a joke in my stand-up where I say I'm a Christian, but I'm not a Christian comedian. I think that's…

— Anjelah Johnson