Funny SMS / Text Messages

Wats d height of hope??
It is: sittin in d exam hall,
holdin d question paper in hand
n tellin ur self
"dude,dnt worry.
Exams wil get postponed!"

Statistics show that 1% of women in the world,
are on medication for mental illness
.
.
.
.
.
So beware!

99% are running around
without proper medication!!

Question : Why do girls close
their eyes while kissing a guy?
Guess‚¦
Guess
.
.
.
Answer : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon
ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.

Teacher told all students
in a class to write an essay
on a cricket match.

All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote No match, due to rain!!!

Question: "How to kill an ant?"

Asked in an exam for 10 marks!

Student:
Mix chilli powder with sugar,
&
Keep it outside the ant's hole

After eating,
ant will search for some water near a water tank.
Push ant in to it!
Now ant will go to dry itself near fire,
When it reaches fire, put a bomb into d fire!
Then admit wounded ant in icu!
And then
remove oxygen mask from it's mouth and kill the ant :-|

Moral:
Don't play with students!
They can do any thing for 10 marks

In a Mental Hospital a journalist asked the Doctor:
How do u determine whether to admit a patient or not?

Dr: Well, we first fill a BathTub & give a teaspoon, a glass & a bucket to the patient & ask them to empty the Bathtub....

Journalist: Oh, obviously a normal person would use d bucket bcoz its bigger....

Dr: NO, a normal person would pull the drain plug!
Now will u plz proceed to bed no.39 ;-)

Roses r red,
violets r blue,
monkeys like you should be kept in the zoo.
Dont get angry,
you will find me there too,
not in the cage but laughing at you.
:D

A ThermoMeter is n0t the 0nly thing
that gets a "DEGREE" without having a "BRAIN"...! :p

A silent msg f0r all studnts;-)