Dog Quote by Peter Griffin

Dear McGyver: Enclosed is a paper clip, a rubber band, and a drinking straw. Please save our dog. -Peter Griffin

— Family Guy

Dear McGyver: Enclosed is a paper clip, a rubber band, and a drinking straw. Now get him to love me back!

— Anonymous

Bring mine unopened, with a napkin and an opener. (Blaine) What? Afraid I’m going to spit in it, big boy? (Aimee)

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

Dude, I gave you a pen, not a chew toy!

— Anonymous

“I pulled my suitcase out of the backseat of my bug, along with Cannoli's new travel case, a spiffy animal print pet backpack on…

— Claire Cook

“If you enjoy sticking a straw in a dog's ear, don't sit next to the pooch with a milkshake.”

— Alan Rogers

Underwear. It's like a goddamned leash. It also constantly reminds me of how funny I look naked.

— Pete Wentz

I always carry a pocketknife in my pocket for opening boxes, cutting a string, or whatever little thing comes up.

— Brad Leone

Underwear. It's like a god damned leash. It also constantly reminds me of how funny I look naked.

— Pete Wentz

“The handkerchief is the universal utensil of the seasoned traveler. It can be a sanitizing device, a seat cover, a dust mask, a garrote,…

— Josiah Bancroft

“This is my emergency kit. It contained a roll of duct tape, a spare pair of pants, an envelope with two hundred dollars, two…

— David Wong

What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?

— Anonymous