"I'm bald, blind and pale. I'm like a……" — Jim Gaffigan

"I'm bald, blind and pale. I'm like a gigantic recessive gene."

— Jim Gaffigan

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99 Quotes by Jim Gaffigan

Jim Gaffigan has 99 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

Oh great, socks. You know I'm dying for your sins right? Yeah, but thanks for the socks! They'll go great…
Bacon bits are like the fairy dust of the food community.
There should be a children's song: 'If you're happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your…
Whenever one of my children says, 'Goodnight, Daddy,' I always think to myself, 'You don't mean that.
Hey, people who travel with their bed pillow. You look insane.
Failing and laughing at your own shortcomings are the hallmarks of a sane parent.
Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January.
It's so obvious The Weather Channel is pro hurricane. Fair and balanced my ass.
Thanksgiving. It's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. 'Hey, how…
Raising kids may be a thankless job with ridiculous hours, but at least the pay sucks.
There were times in my life when I had one thing to do all day, but I still couldn’t get…
If camping is so great, why are the bugs always trying to get in your house?

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More Bald Quotes

This quote is filed under Bald Quotes, one of 191 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:

Bald as the bare mountain tops are bald, with a baldness full of grandeur. — Matthew Arnold
The Falklands thing was a fight between two bald men over a comb. — Jorge Luis Borges
You never see a man walking down the street with a woman who has a little potbelly and a bald… — Elayne Boosler
Middle age is when your old classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you. — Bennett Cerf
We can lie in the language of dress or try ot tell the truth; but unless we are naked and… — Alison Lurie
If I was at the club you know I balled(bald), CHEMO. — Drake
I have my own identity ... The whole Michael thing does drive me nuts sometimes because people won't leave it… — Kobe Bryant
All beliefs are bald ideas. — Francis Picabia
My veins are filled, once a week with a Neapolitan carpet cleaner distilled from the Adriatic and I am as… — John Cheever
When others kid me about being bald, I simply tell them that the way I figure it, the good Lord… — John Glenn
Physically, the Ventoux is dreadful. Bald, it's the spirit of Dry: Its climate (it is much more an essence of… — Roland Barthes
Can't act. Can't sing. Slightly bald. Can dance a little. — Fred Astaire

See all 191 Bald Quotes »