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Best One Quotes by Nikhil Saluja
- If you have a son, you only have to worry about one penis. If you have a daughter, you have to worry about every penis…
- Twitter: where no one is afraid to say the first thing that pops into their head.
- If you're going to act like a pussy, you should at least dress like one... Here I bought you the smallest dildo I could find!
- Almost all serial killers are men. That's because women like to kill one man slowly over many, many years.
- There is only one thing that gets me through the day, knowing that someone loves me as much as you do.
- When life gives me lemons, I'm like What's the catch? Because in this expensive world no one's just giving away free lemons.
- Humility is a virtue until one becomes proud of it.
- Had a weird dream last night that I murdered 4 people who unfollowed me on twitter. But woke up relieved to find it's still just…
- HUSBAND, A man who has one mistake in his existence -- and keeps learning from it all his life;
- HUSBAND, SMART, One who thinks twice before saying nothing;
- LOVE, Man's grand delusion that one woman differs from another;
- DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
- MARRIAGE, A very good way to promote civilisation -- if you get a good wife you will be happy, if you get a bad one…
- MARRIAGE, The alliance of two people, one who never remembers birthdays, and the other who never forgets them;
- MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, one in which the husband knows when to remember and a wife knows what to forget;
- MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, is when a husband can determine when his wife comes to the end of one argument and begins the next;
- MARRIAGE, SUCCESSFUL, one in which a woman gives the best years of her life to the man that made them so;
- WIFE, The one person who in an argument, if you win -- you lose;
- WIFE, A lady who is much like an angler -- each think the best one got away;
- WIFE, WISE, one who makes her husband feel as if he is head of the house when, in reality, he is only chairman of the…
- Whenever a girl says she's fine sleep with one eye open.
- Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other: 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'
- A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.'
- Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says 'Dam!'
- Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'
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More One Quotes
- In order to go on living one must try to escape the death involved in perfectionism. — Hannah Arendt
- Power and violence are opposites; where the one rules absolutely, the other is absent. Violence appears where power is in jeopardy, but… — Hannah Arendt
- Poets are the only people to whom love is not only a crucial, but an indispensable experience, which entitles them to mistake… — Hannah Arendt
- Economic growth may one day turn out to be a curse rather than a good, and under no conditions can it either… — Hannah Arendt
- To be free in an age like ours, one must be in a position of authority. That in itself would be enough… — Hannah Arendt
- No cause is left but the most ancient of all, the one, in fact, that from the beginning of our history has… — Hannah Arendt
- The defiance of established authority, religious and secular, social and political, as a world-wide phenomenon may well one day be accounted the… — Hannah Arendt
- Where all are guilty, no one is; confessions of collective guilt are the best possible safeguard against the discovery of culprits, and… — Hannah Arendt
- I find that it's hard to fully examine one's life and not have faith be part of the discussion. — J. J. Abrams
- The most perfect political community is one in which the middle class is in control, and outnumbers both of the other classes. — Aristotle
- All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsions, habit, reason, passion, desire. — Aristotle
- Jealousy is both reasonable and belongs to reasonable men, while envy is base and belongs to the base, for the one makes… — Aristotle