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Jokes Quotes by Unknown Author
- Contrary to reports, this boy is not a billionaire or going to be richer than any Beatle... and not just in the sense of money,…
- I haven't taken my Christmas lights down. They look so nice on the pumpkin.
- Both law and comedy are heavily focused on thought and viewing all angles. To write a good joke, you have to look at a premise…
- Sir Joh Bjelke-Petersen has been the Queensland premier the whole time we've been in Australia, and the state is a national joke for having a…
- To call them emotional comedies sounds cloying. Like Billy Wilder said, 'You want to make them laugh and you want to make them cry,' and…
- My goal is to get on the national team. People joke that we'll be able to go to Beijing in 2008, but it's just jokes…
- I've always felt that animals are the purest spirits in the world. They don't fake or hide their feelings, and they are the most loyal…
- It is natural that people do not want to be involved with us too much. There is no problem down to the smallest egotistical longing…
- Mathematics is a collection of cheap tricks and dirty jokes.
- A beautiful problem is no joke!
- You think a student leaves each week because they are out of the academy. This is just a cover up to hide serious injury that…
- I make jokes about the fact that as a neuro-surgeon I shouldn't be required at a motor race because the drivers don't have any brains....…
- When Harel wished to put a joke or witticism into circulation, he was in the habit of connecting it with some celebrated name, on the…
- We were having tea with my mother-in-law the other day and out of the blue she said, "I've decided I want to be cremated." I…
- My mother-in-law was so mean she blinded herself just to get a free dog.
- My night has become a sunny dawn because of you.
- A true man does not need to romance a different girl every night, a true man romances the same girl for the rest of her…
- Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
- A guy at work went in for a competition and won a trip to China. He's out there now...trying to win a trip back!
- I met this guy who said he loved children, then I found out he was on parole for it.
More Jokes Quotes
- Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies. — Aristotle
- As the old joke goes, I have all the sins together. I am a woman, a Socialist, separated and agnostic. — Michelle Bachelet
- If equal affection cannot be, let the more loving be me. — Wystan Hugh Auden
- Okay this how I ride, two bad hoes inside. One hoe say she ready, the other ho said she tired. I'mma drop… — 2 Chainz
- The gods too are fond of a joke. — Aristotle
- I'm not Mr. Debonair Suave. I'm just a regular boy who goofs around, pulls pranks, and makes jokes. That doesn't sound very… — Jensen Ackles
- I try to do women's-point-of-view comedy. The joke is, 'This is what I think; there's the truth.' I try to think of… — Roseanne Barr
- I was raised on government cheese. As an adult, in my first marriage, my husband and I worked real hard just to… — Roseanne Barr